Takahashi Ai’s Radio-graphy

Japanese log

Notes

• 2004-10-30 「MBS YoungTown Doyoubi」 Official Site
• participants: Akashiya Sanma, Murakami Sho-ji, Tamai Kenji
• YanMusume: Takahashi Ai (20th appearance)
• guest: Yaguchi Mari appears as a pinch-hitter for regular Natsumi Abe who’s absent because of bad physical condition (it’s Yaguchi’s first appearance after 6 years)
• semi-regular Fujimoto Miki is absent too

Yaguchi was longing to appear in Yantan? Sanma-san wants to become Beyoncé!? Takahashi Ai is a little fool? Presenting Yantan gags at a Morning Musume concert? “Iyashitai” - How many times do I have to tell you!? ~~from the YanDo staff message board~~

Digest

• Opening
  • about Yaguchi’s return to Yantan after 6 years
  • about Sanma’s adventures at funerals and weddings
• Listener mail corner (18′46”)
  • about Yaguchi being an adult and Takahashi still being a kid
  • [Subject] Bobby Ologun will take part in K-1 (21′28”)
    • about Bobby’s first K-1 match
  • [Subject] Summary of Yaguchi’s first appearance in Yantan 6 years ago (30′03”)
    • about Yaguchi becoming the next leader of Morning Musume soon
    • about Sanma wanting to become Beyoncé in his show end-of-year show “Santaku”
      • about Morning Musume meeting Britney Spears last year
  • [Subject] Yaguchi’s interesting stories about Nacchi and Takahashi (44′18”)
    • Yaguchi talks about Takahashi’s dialect and about Nacchi being an airhead
• Listener mail corner - Part II (51′35”)
  • talk about Aichan’s indecisiveness when shopping and her 500 yen collection
  • [Subject] Takahashi should say a Yantan gag in Morning Musume’s concert in Osaka Jou Hall (59′54”)
    • Sanma and Sho-ji try to come up with a gag for Aichan
• Song: Morning Musume’s 「Namida ga Tomaranai Hougako」 (67′02”)
• “Listener wo iyashitai” corner (68′37”)
  • [Takahashi]
    • 「Yeees! Here you have a large serving of Aichan!」 (69′30”~)
    • 「I want to become good at it.」 (73′04”~)
  • [Yaguchi]
    • 「It’s ok. Today you can do anything you like.」 (71′41”~)
    • 「Tell me where it feels good.」 (75′17”~)
• Karaoke Box 「Sanchama」 (76′43”)
  • 「Tamai no scandal」 (parody of Checkers’ 「Ano ko to scandal」) Tamai sings it
• Ending (79′31”)
  • talk about how Yaguchi’s first Yantan after 6 years was

Detailed description

[Please click here to download the whole episode as a mp3-file.]

Opening

Sanma:	Now, today there are two very… unusual… guests sitting in front of us.
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	It’s Takahashi-san and…
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	…Yaguchi.
Yaguchi:	Yes! Long time no see!
Sanma:	We really haven’t seen each other for a long time.
Yaguchi:	Hehe(lol)
Sanma:	You seem well, that’s what’s most important.
Yaguchi:	Ehehe(lol) I’m fine. Yes.
Sanma:	Yaguchi has really turned into an adult by now even if she still looks like this.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Really?
Sanma:	You’ve always been that tiny, tiny girl with the tiny figure…
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	That’s why you always have that teenager image.
Yaguchi:	That’s right…
Sanma:	Now you’re… 21?
Yaguchi:	Yes!
Sanma:	She’s 21 already. Today when I saw that different members than planned came here…
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	…I thought “What the heck is Yaguchi doing here?”.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	I thought “What did she come here for?”.
Yaguchi:	Why’s that?!
Takahashi:	Fufu(lol).
Sanma:	Well, because…
Yaguchi:	I’ve been wanting to appear in Yantan all this time and I asked many different people “Why can’t I appear in Yantan?”. Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Fuhaha(lol) Looks like it was good that you asked. They probably thought “Let’s just send Yaguchi at such times.”.
Yaguchi:	Yes. Thank you very much.

• Sanma’s opening talk:
• Since Sanma’s friend Shimada Shinsuke got involved in an incident resulting in an injury and had to take a break from hosting the show “Quiz Hexagon”, Sanma thought of hosting the show in his place and did a simulation with Sho-ji, Okure and Jimmy, but it was impossible to do with that kind of team because no one could answer a question right.
• When Sanma went to the funeral of Miyoko Asada’s mother and gave her incense money, Miyoko told him “You really try to solve everything with money, huh?” and left him speechless. She’s also the type to ask “Where’s the afterparty? Where’s the afterparty?” at someone’s funeral.
• When Sanma, Sho-ji and Jimmy went to a funeral, Jimmy’s jersey came off when he stood up to burn incense and he didn’t notice it because his legs went numb from sitting upright on the floor. So he was basically sitting there in front of everyone, burning incense with his ass exposed and according to Sho-ji, you could see his asshole too. After that incident, that family broke off all contact with Sanma and his gang.
• Once Sanma had to hold a speech at a marriage and he said “Then I’d like to propose a toast to the couple. Ehh… I think it’s the first time for the bride to hear a toast like this… Well, it’s the second time for the groom though.” and everyone went silent. Sanma didn’t know that the groom had kept his first marriage and divorce a secret from his bride and her family. When Sanma felt the tension in the air, he said “Sho-ji, let’s get the hell out of here.”. Sho-ji: “But then we won’t be able to taste the main steak!” Sanma: “We’ll get the hell out of here. This is no good….”
• Sanma talks about what Sho-ji said at a friend’s marriage. When the bride said in tears “From now on we’ll be living together.”, Sho-ji shouted “Haven’t you two been living together for half a year already?!”. Which made Sanma & co laugh, but the bride was embarrassed and speechless. Sanma: “Let’s get away from here. Hurry up and start the car!”.

Sanma:	You know… Lots of bad things happened to us since that incident. (the one with Jimmy and his naked ass)
Tamai:	Lots of bad things.
Sanma:	I guess, you shouldn’t mess with the dead.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	(lol) MSB!
Everyone:	Youngtown!
Sanma:	I’m Akashiya Sanma.
Tamai:	I’m Tamai Kenji.
Sho-ji:	Sho-ji here!
Takahashi:	From Morning Musume, Takahashi Ai and…
Yaguchi:	…Yaguchi Mari!

Listener mail corner (18′46”)

Sanma:	Listener mail corner!!
Everyone:	Yaay!
Sanma:	Ehh… Nacchi’s not here today and we can’t do the next corner without Nacchi. (Osabaki no corner)
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	Yaguchi doesn’t know the corner either.
Yaguchi:	No.
Sanma:	And Takahashi… well… she doesn’t have the ability to make a clear decision if something’s right or wrong.
Takahashi:	But I’m already 18, you know?
Sanma:	…but you’re unreliable.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lo)
Takahashi:	Am I?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Ara.
Sanma:	You always show your foolish side.
Yaguchi:	Ahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	That’s why that would be a bit…
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Well, Yaguchi’s quite level-headed.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Yaguchi looks reliable to me…
Yaguchi:	(lol) Ah, thank you very much.
Sanma:	She really does.
Sho-ji:	Eh? How old are you now, Yaguchi-san?
Sanma:	21.
Yaguchi:	I’m 21, yes.
Takahashi:	An adult.
Sanma:	Eh?
Takahashi:	She’s an adult.
Sanma:	Yeah. And you’re a kid.
Yaguchi:	Hahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	You’re more of a kid than a 18 year old should be.
Takahashi:	I am?!
Sanma:	Yes, yes, yes. When we were 18, we were already like adults. Actually.
Sho-ji:	I was already earning salary when I was 18.
Sanma:	Ah, right, right, we… No, she earns salary too, you know?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	She earns a lot.
Sho-ji:	I had learned a handicraft back then! A handicraft. (te ni shoku = handicraft)
Takahashi:	What’s a handicraft?
Sho-ji:	I had learned a handicraft…
Takahashi:	You mean in this world of showbusiness?
Sho-ji:	No, no, no.
Takahashi:	Umm… So you had a normal job…?
Sho-ji:	…what are you doing to me? (because their dialog isn’t getting anywhere)
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	A handicraft.
Takahashi:	A lifework? (tenshoku = lifework)
Sanma:	Not a lifework. This guy doesn’t have any lifework.
Sho-ji:	Seriously.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	What are you doing to me?
Takahashi:	I’m sorry.
Sanma:	Umm… He can weld things. (yousetsu = welding)
Takahashi:	Cultivate things? (youshoku = cultivation)
Yaguchi:	“Cultivate” (lol)
Sanma:	He can weld parts of a ship.
Takahashi:	Ah-ahhh!!! You can operate a ship?!
Sho-ji:	Yeah. (lol)
Yaguchi:	Not that. Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	Not cultivation, I said “welding”, didn’t I?
Takahashi:	Welding?
Yaguchi:	Umm… How do you call that kind of… umm…
Sanma:	Welding! Welding. Joining metals together. Metal welding.
Sho-ji:	Joining metal parts together.
Takahashi:	Ahhhh!
Sanma:	Welding.
Takahashi:	In a factory!
Sho-ji:	In a factory.
Sanma:	In one for ships. He used to work in one and went to an evening course.
Takahashi:	Amazing!
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	At the age of 16? (juurokusai)
Sho-ji:	Hmm? Standoffish? (mizukusai)
Takahashi:	(lol) When you were 16?
Sho-ji:	(lol) When I was 16.
Takahashi:	Amazing!
Sho-ji:	Amazing, isn’t it?
Yaguchi:	Heee… amazing.
Sanma:	Yeah. When he was about to join Yoshimoto Kogyo, all the big comedians of Yoshimoto Kogyo were standing there and Sho-ji said “I want to join Yoshimoto Kogyo.”. When they asked “So what is it that you can do?”, he replied “I can weld things.”.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	Awesome.
Sho-ji:	They were all like “Well, you can’t really weld things on the stage…”.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	But on the next day, I really got to weld something.
Takahashi:	Ah, really?
Sho-ji:	The handrail of a guest seating had come off.
Takahashi:	Ahh…
Sho-ji:	When I repaired it perfectly, I was told “You’re really a pro!”.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Awesome!
Sho-ji:	I only wished they’d tell me the same about my skills as a comedian.
Sanma:	Fuhahaha(lol)

first mail: Bobby Ologun will take part in K-1 (21′28”)

from “Puar” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. It has been announced that Bobby will take part in “K-1 Dynamite!!” on New Year’s Eve. At the press conference, he acted like he had buck teeth and said “This is all thanks to that guy. Please treat me well.” and made everyone in the conference hall laugh. Sanma-san, you go to Australia around that time every year, will you be able to watch the match?

• Excerpts from the press conference were shown in Sanma’s show “Karakuri TV”.
• Bobby: “I want to end the match as quickly as possible.” Reporter: “Why?” Bobby: “Because I wanna go pound mochi in Tochigi.”
• Bobby’s opponent still hasn’t been decided yet. It’s a bit of a dilemma for the K-1 world: they have to make him fight against a famous fighter since Bobby is immensly popular, but none of the famous fighters want to risk losing to an amateur like Bobby. Of course no one expects Bobby to win, but K-1 is a sport where one weird blow from Bobby could knock the pro out.
• He had a practice match against Musashi and even Musashi admits that Bobby’s strong.

second mail: Summary of Yaguchi’s first appearance in Yantan 6 years ago (30′03”)

from “Nijuunenmae kara kawaranai Ootomo-san” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. Today it’s Yaguchi-san’s first appearance in YanDo after 6 years (last appearance in June 1998), so I listened to the Yantan episode of that time I had recorded on MD. Here’s a summary: She appeared alongside her senpais Nacchi and Iida-san, and Ichii-san who’s from the same generation as her. But Kei-chan, who’s from the same generation too, wasn’t invited. Later Kei-chan complained about being the only one who didn’t get invited. Wada Akiko-san, who had coincidentally come to Takebashi station, came into the studio during commercials to greet Yaguchi-san and the others and caused Sanma-san, who was having a smoke, to panic. Yaguchi-san got to meet Beat Takeshi’s daughter, who announced her marriage the day before, in Music Station and was surprised at how “very mature she is even though they’re the same age”. Sanma-san also said jokingly that “Yaguchi will probably start a solo career very soon”, but now it feels weird that that Yaguchi-san is about to become the oldest member of Morning Musume after Iida-san has graduated.

 

Sanma:	This is from “Nijuunenmae kara kawaranai Ootomo-san”. “Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening.
Sanma:	“Today it’s Yaguchi-san’s first appearance in YanDo after 6 years (last appearance in June 1998)…”
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Eh? Why does he know all this?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	How old were you then?
Yaguchi:	Umm… 6 years ago… I was 15.
Sho-ji:	Ueeh~
Yaguchi:	It was shortly after I joined.
Sanma:	Haaa…. “…so I listened to the Yantan episode of that time I had recorded on MD. Here’s a summary.”.
Yaguchi:	Eh? Eh?
Sanma:	It’s written here.
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“She appeared alongside her senpais Nacchi and Iida-san, and Ichii-san who’s from the same generation as her.”
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“But Kei-chan, who’s from the same generation too, wasn’t invited. Later Kei-chan complained about being the only one who didn’t get invited.”
Yaguchi:	Oh.
Sanma:	“Wada Akiko-san, who had coincidentally come to Takebashi station, came into the studio during commercials to greet Yaguchi-san and the others and caused Sanma-san, who was having a smoke, to panic.”
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Ah, that really happened. Wada Akiko…
Tamai:	Ahh….
Yaguchi:	Yes, it did. It was the first time I met her.
Sanma:	Whoa… “Yaguchi-san got to meet Beat Takeshi’s daughter, who announced her marriage the day before, in Music Station and was surprised at how “very mature she is even though they’re the same age”.”
Yaguchi:	Yes! This is nostalgic…
Sanma:	I see… It was when Shouko-chan performed as a singer in Music Station.
Yaguchi:	That’s right, we performed on the same day.
Takahashi:	You’re both the same age, huh?
Yaguchi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	“Sanma-san also said jokingly that “Yaguchi will probably start a solo career very soon”, but now it feels weird that that Yaguchi-san is about to become the oldest member of Morning Musume after Iida-san has graduated.” it says.
Yaguchi:	Hehehe(lol)
Sanma:	Eh, is Iida-san quitting?
Yaguchi:	Yes. She’ll graduate next year… and go solo.
Sanma:	Haaa… Then you’ll become the leader?
Yaguchi:	Yes, I will.
Sho-ji:	Ohhh.
Sanma:	Eh? It’s already decided that you’ll be the leader?
Yaguchi:	It is.
Sanma:	Whoa….
Yaguchi:	I’ll have to do my best starting next year. (lol)
Sho-ji:	Is it tough being the leader?
Yaguchi:	Being leader is… I wonder if it’s tough. The other members have all become reliable, so I don’t think it’ll be that tough.
Takahashi:	But you’re like a leader figure.
Yaguchi:	Really?
Takahashi:	You’ve been like one from the beginning.
Yaguchi:	No, no…
Sanma:	Right, right, she seems very reliable even though she looks like this. Well, she’ll become your leader, so I guess…
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	Eh? She’ll be your leader, right?
Takahashi:	She will.
Sanma:	Yeah, that would change your relationship, right?
Takahashi:	Ah, but you know? She teaches me many things, ya know?
Sanma:	What kind of things?
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	“…ya know?” (lol)
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	What kind of things for example?
Takahashi:	Yeah… What kind of things…
Sanma:	That’s my line.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	She teaches you things, right?
Takahashi:	She does!
Sanma:	That’s why I’m asking you.
Sho-ji:	What kind of things?
Takahashi:	Umm… During dance lessons for example.
Sanma:	Ah! Is Yaguchi good at dancing?
Takahashi:	She’s good!
Yaguchi:	Eh, that’s not true at all.
Takahashi:	If there’s something I don’t understand, I ask her.
Sanma:	So in short, she can memorize the choreography quickly.
Takahashi:	Very quick!
Sanma:	Same with me!
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol) Is that so?
Takahashi:	Ahaha(lol)
Sanma:	No, I mean… (lol)
Sho-ji:	He’s always dancing around.
Sanma:	No, no, it’s not like that.
Tamai:	Since when are you in Morning Musume?
Sho-ji:	He’s always loved dancing.
Takahashi:	Ahhh~ Can you dance?
Sho-ji:	He’s currently practicing musical instruments, but he spends more time making up dance moves than playing instruments.
Sanma:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Is that so?
Yaguchi:	Ehh?
Sho-ji:	No one expects you to come up with dances for the music, but Sanma-san is always like “You have to dance like this at this part.”.
Yaguchi:	Ahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ohh~
Sanma:	There’s a show called “SanTaku” I present with Kimura-kun at the end of every year.
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	And last year I tried to become Eminem.
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	And this year, I want to… become Beyoncé.
Yaguchi:	Ehhhh~?
Takahashi:	(lol) Beyoncé~~?!
Yaguchi:	How do you become her?!
Sanma:	Right now, I want to become Beyoncé the most.
Yaguchi:	Ehh? Why?
Sanma:	Because she’s so cool!
Yagu/Taka:	She IS cool, but…
Sho-ji:	Eh? What? Is that Beyoncé another…
Sanma:	She’s a dancer. A girl. It’s this one. The one I always imitate. ♪Oh-oh, oh-oh♪
Sho-ji:	Ahh, yes, yes.
Sanma:	♪Oh-oh, oh no no♪
Yagu/Taka:	HAHAHAHAHA(ROFL)
Yaguchi:	Yes, that’s it, that’s it. Haha(lol)
Sanma:	…(lol)
Sho-ji:	And that part…
Sanma:	I want to try that part. That ♪oh-oh, oh-oh♪ part. ♪Oh-oh, oh no no♪
Yagu/Taka:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s like her, right?
Yaguchi:	(lol) Yes…
Tamai:	It sounds a bit like Ondo music.
Takahashi:	Haha…. Hilarious…
Sanma:	♪Oh-oh, oh-oh♪ Right? ♪Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no♪ Right?
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	It goes like ♪Dan-da-da-da-da-da~ Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no♪
Yagu/Taka:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	She only moves her shoulders there. Not her hips.
Yaguchi:	Amazing… (lol)
Sanma:	Only black people could move that way.
Yaguchi:	You’re practicing a difficult part. Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	It might be the most difficult part of the dance.
Sanma:	When I thought it was easy, it was difficult as hell.
Tamai:	Yeah, that’s difficult.
Sanma:	Well, we still haven’t practiced it yet. The next time we both have some free time… Kimura-kun can dance it a bit, so he teaches it to me and we’ll perform it together.
Yaguchi:	Heee~ Amazing.
Sanma:	That’s why I learned… that you sholdn’t underestimate dancing. Yesterday I told him “Ah, that dance is really easy, isn’t it?” and showed him how I dance it. But he said “Keep a whole day open for it. It’ll take you a whole day to learn that part.”. I was like “Why the heck? I’ve already learned it!”. He said “You have not.”.
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	I asked “Isn’t this how Beyoncé moves?”, but he told me “I’m telling you, that’s totally wrong!”.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Isn’t it like ♪Oh-oh, oh-oh♪?
Yaguchi:	Well…
Takahashi:	Nyahahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	A whole day…
Sanma:	It’s like this, right? ♪Oh-oh, oh-oh♪
Yaguchi:	Well, it does look like it… (lol)
Tamai:	But you have to move to the rhythm.
Sanma:	♪Oh-oh♪… Eh? Can’t I do it freestyle?
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	There isn’t anything like freestyle… (lol)
Sho-ji:	That looked like the way Marcel-san as the “Chicken Lady” moves. (lol) (lol does he mean this?)
Sanma:	No one’s gonna understand that comparison!
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	The way a chicken moves… like this. (lol)
Sanma:	It’s Beyoncé! You don’t know Beyoncé, do you?
Sho-ji:	I don’t.
Takahashi:	Eh, you don’t know…?
Sanma:	Sho-ji doesn’t know. He never listens to western music.
Takahashi:	I see…
Sho-ji:	I don’t. If I listen to music, it’s usually Enka.
Yagu/Taka:	Ahh…
Sanma:	He listens to Enka and…
Sho-ji:	Takuro-san.
Sanma:	…folk music.
Yaguchi:	Yes, yes.
Sanma:	Also Begin.
Sho-ji:	Begin. I love Begin.
Sanma:	They sing ♪Shimanchu nu…♪ and other songs that piss you off.
Sho-ji:	(lol) I like their songs.
Sanma:	I want to try to become Beyoncé this time.
Tamai:	Hooo~
Sho-ji:	You say you want to, but it’s not been decided yet?
Sanma:	Nope. I want to.
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Well, they all looked at me skeptically.
Sho-ji:	And they all tried to stop you.
Sanma:	No, they didn’t try to stop me. They were like “Can’t be helped if he wants it.”.
Sho-ji:	So they all wanted to make it possible for you, make your dream come true.
Sanma:	Looks like it.
Yaguchi:	Mmm…
Sanma:	Beyoncé is damn cool.
Yaguchi:	She is.
Sanma:	Right. She’ll come to Japan at the end of this year. Destiny’s Child will.
Takahashi:	Oh~
Tamai:	Yes.
Takahashi:	I didn’t know.
Sanma:	And we’re negotiating if they can appear in the Christmas show. The one I presented last year too.
Tamai:	Ohhhh.
Sanma:	Then I can meet Beyoncé.
Takahashi:	Oh! We got to meet Buri-chan last time.
Sanma:	Buri?
Takahashi:	Britney-san.
Sanma:	Eh?
Takahashi:	Britney-san.
Sanma:	Ah, right, right! Britney came last year.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	You met her too, right?
Yagu/Taka:	Yes, I met her.
Sanma:	Her legs had grown fatter, wasn’t it a bit of a shock?
Yaguchi:	It was… It was different than seeing her on TV.
Sanma:	Totally different. I was shocked at how fat she had become!
Yaguchi:	Mmm…
Sanma:	I couldn’t say it back then, but the members of Tube said they were big fans of Britney and…
Yaguchi:	Yes, yes.
Sanma:	…they said “We’re so happy to meet the person we admire! Uwaa, you’re so pretty!”, but after Britney had gone to perform on stage they told me “Sanma-san, we’re in shock!”.
Yaguchi:	Ehhh~
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	“She’s become so fat!” (lol)
Takahashi:	Then aren’t you better off not meeting Beyoncé?
Sanma:	But Beyoncé should be alright~~
Yaguchi:	No, she’s quite…
Takahashi:	But she’s quite buff!
Sanma:	No way!
Yaguchi:	She has a small face, but…
Takahashi:	She’s really buff! I watched a lot of MTV when I was over there. When we were in Hawaii on our tour, I’ve been watching MTV all the time and Beyoncé was shown.
Sanma:	I have DVDs of her!
Takahashi:	Eh, but she’s quite buff, isn’t she?
Yaguchi:	Her waist is…
Sho-ji:	Is her face small?
Takahashi:	Her face is small, but…
Sanma:	But it’s cool that she’s so buff!
Tamai:	She’s quite buff.
Yaguchi:	I bet she trains hard.
Takahashi:	She’s good at dancing though.
Sanma:	I see..
Takahashi:	Pretty buff.
Tamai:	Her waist and her shoulders…
Sanma:	Yeah. She’s now said to be the best at dancing in the world, right?
Takahashi:	Ah, is that so?
Yaguchi:	Eh, I didn’t know.
Sanma:	I heard there are many ways she dances that can be only performed by her.
Yaguchi:	Ehh, amazing.
Sanma:	Ehhh… But even if they say that, it doesn’t tell me anything.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	What exactly makes her the best?
Sho-ji:	I bet instead of that difficult dance, you’ll change into a cheerleader uniform on air anyway.
Sanma:	Don’t say stupid things!
Tamai:	Hahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Dancing like a cheerleader all alone.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	Like in the “Peachies”.
Sho-ji:	Wearing a skirt.

• Sanma talks about how Sanma and Sho-ji appeared in a Circle K cm as the “Peachy’s”, a cheerleader group, wearing pink bob hair wigs and cheerleader uniforms. The cm was first aired in local Nagoya TV, but flopped and didn’t reach Tokyo.
• Sanma says he looks great with pink bob hair. ~_~

• Btw. Sanma and Kimura remade (or rather edited) Beyoncé’s “Crazy in Love” mv in “SanTaku”. You can watch it here. (It starts at around 3:41)

third mail: Yaguchi’s interesting stories about Nacchi and Takahashi (44′18”)

from “Surprise” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. This week’s guest Yaguchi-san, according to Sanma-san’s Yantan talk on April 10th, went to watch Sanma-san’s theater play “JOKER” together with Mikitty and Country Musume and said “I want to appear in Yantan too!”. It seems like she really wants to come to Yantan, is that true? If you know any interesting backstage stories about Nacchi or Takahashi Ai-chan, Yaguchi-san, please tell us.

 

Sanma:	This is from “Suprise”-san. “Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening!
Sanma:	“Last week’s guest”… Eh? “This week”. I’m sorry. “This week’s guest Yaguchi-san, according to Sanma-san’s Yantan talk on April 10th, went to watch Sanma-san’s theater play “JOKER” together with Mikitty and Country Musume and said “I want to appear in Yantan too!”.”
Yaguchi:	Yes!
Sanma:	“It seems like she really wants to come to Yantan, is that true?” it says. What’s this about?
Yaguchi:	Eh? It’s like this. Quite a few of our members leave in the middle of work saying “We’re going to Youngtown~”.
Sanma:	Yes, yes.
Yaguchi:	And I always keep waiting, thinking “But I have free time too…”. I never get invited here.
Sanma:	Ahh, I see. “It seems like she really wants to come to Yantan”. She seems to know that.
Yaguchi:	Eh?
Sanma:	This “Surprise”-san.
Yaguchi:	Yes. Looks like it.
Sanma:	Heee~ “If you know any interesting backstage stories about Nacchi or Takahashi Ai-chan, Yaguchi-san, please tell us.”
Takahashi:	Ehh?!
Yaguchi:	Hehehehe(lol) Ehhh? Nacchi and Takahashi?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Yaguchi:	Ehh… What could it be…
Sanma:	You can’t talk about that kind of things on radio, right? Even if you knew such stories.
Takahashi:	Is that so?
Sanma:	No way you could talk about that!
Yaguchi:	(lol) No, that’s not true.
Sanma:	You can’t tell any weird stories…
Yaguchi:	I can’t tell any weird stories.
Sanma:	Right?
Yaguchi:	Yes. Ehh.. Are there any stories I could tell…
Takahashi:	There… aren’t.
Yaguchi:	But the way Aichan speaks is sometimes really funny.
Takahashi:	(lol)
Sanma:	That’s pitiable.
Yaguchi:	Sometimes she speaks with a voice of a little kid, right?
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Well, it’s because she shows her foolish side.
Yaguchi:	You’re right. Hehehe(lol)
Sanma:	That’s true…
Yaguchi:	Yeah…
Sanma:	Sometimes you pity her, right?
Yaguchi:	(lol) No, I don’t do that.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	I don’t do that. I think “How cute” while listening to her.
Sanma:	Oh really…?
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	(lol) Is it not good?
Sho-ji:	But when you’ve soon turned into the leader, you gotta do something about it.
Sanma:	Right, right, right.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	When you’re the leader and she…
Sanma:	…shows her foolish side again, it would be a big problem for you too, wouldn’t it?
Yaguchi:	Ahh… Well, that’s true, but it’s her character…
Sanma:	Ah, you have to treasure it as her character.
Yaguchi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	And you always talk about losing your dialect, but you haven’t lost it at all!
Takahashi:	But I lost it!
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol) No…
Sanma:	Eh? You talk about losing the dialect, but you haven’t lost it at all.
Takahashi:	Iyaa!
Yaguchi:	Hihihi(lol)
Sanma:	No, your “iyaa” is already wrong.
Takahashi:	Iya!
Sanma	“Iya”
Takahashi:	(lol)
Sanma:	Happy new…?
Takahashi:	…iyaa!
Sanma:	It’s not the time of the year for that!
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Yaguchi:	That’s right. When she’s speaking with dialect, she speaks so fast sometimes that I don’t understand what she’s saying.
Sanma:	On the concert stage too?
Yaguchi:	During a concert, when she gets all tense, her voice tone goes up by one octave.
Sanma:	Ahh, that can’t be helped. It’s the same for everyone.
Yaguchi:	And she speaks so extremely fast sometimes that I have to ask “Sorry, but could you please say that again?”.
Takahashi:	(lol) That happens.
Yaguchi:	Yeah…
Sanma:	It happens? (lol)
Takahashi:	It happens. (lol)
Sanma:	It’s something embarrassing though.
Takahashi:	(lol) Yes.
Sho-ji:	And you get all tense?
Takahashi:	I do!
Sanma:	That’s not good. Murakami-san here gets all calm.
Sho-ji:	Instead.
Sanma:	When he gets on stage.
Yaguchi:	Ehhhh?!
Takahashi:	No way!
Sanma:	He becomes slow and sluggish.
Sho-ji:	Seriously. That way I don’t even panic when no one laughs at my jokes.
Sanma:	Hyaa(lol)
Yaguchi:	You have your own pace.
Sho-ji:	Everyone around me is panicking. Sanma-san and the others. Like “Wha-wha-what are you doing?! What are you doing?!”. I think “What are they panicking for?”
Sanma:	No matter if he says his lines wrong or splutters, he’s standing there looking normally.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Seriously.
Sanma:	That way it would look like the next person did a mistake. That’s why we all act like nothing happened, because no one wants to look like he was to blame.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	But this guy is just looking at the audience calmly.
Yaguchi:	Ehhh~
Sanma:	Looking like “I nailed my line perfectly.”, even though he was totally off.
Yaguchi:	“Totally off” (lol)
Sho-ji:	Even if 700 to 1000 are looking at me, I can keep looking back silently for 10 minutes.
Sanma:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	Ehhhh~~?! That’s amazing!
Sho-ji:	Amazing, isn’t it?
Yaguchi:	That’s amazing… somehow.
Sanma:	It’s amazing in a wrong way. It’s rather sad, but amazing.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	But Nacchi doesn’t make many mistakes, does she?
Yaguchi:	That’s not true.
Sanma:	Ah, really?
Yaguchi:	Nacchi is quite… how do you call it… an airhead. Normally.
Sho-ji:	Ehh, is that so?
Yaguchi:	Eh? You don’t think so?
Sanma:	I think she’s become quite level-headed.
Sho-ji:	Yeah.
Yaguchi:	Umm… Did her mother tell you what she said in sleep?
Sanma:	She didn’t, she didn’t. What’s it about?
Yaguchi:	Somehow… she was dreaming and when her mother woke her up with “Nacchi, wake up already!”.
Sanma:	Yeah.
Yaguchi:	Then she said for some unknown reason… still in sleep… “Banana~~”.
Takahashi:	Hyahyahyahya(lol)
Yaguchi:	That was.. quite…
Sanma:	She never talks about stuff like that here.
Yaguchi:	Eh, really?!
Sanma:	Really, really. She acts like the “always cute and level-headed” Nacchi here.
Yaguchi:	Ara. Ara. Ara?! Is that so?! She’s not like that at all!
Takahashi:	She often talks about stuff like that in dance lessons.
Yaguchi:	Yeah, yeah. She makes funny faces too.
Sanma:	She never does that here!
Yaguchi:	And moves in weird ways too.
Sanma:	She can even do things like that?
Yaguchi:	She can.
Takahashi:	It’s hilarious!
Sanma:	She never does it here… Ah, because Takahashi is here too, she tries to act reliable.
Yaguchi:	Ahh….
Takahashi:	Ah, so that’s it!
Sanma:	Eh?
Everyone:	Hahahaha(lol)
Tamai:	Eh? (lol)
Yaguchi:	I wonder if that’s the reason…
Takahashi:	So it’s enough if I become more reliable?
Sanma:	If you do that, Nacchi will be able to act like a boke too.
Yagu/Taka:	Ahh….
Yaguchi:	That could be!
Sanma:	Yeah, that plays a role too. Of course.
Yaguchi:	I see.
Sanma:	Since Takahashi’s a boke, Nacchi thought of acting more level-headed. But well, she’s already 23 now. It’s true that she’s gradually becoming more mature.
Yaguchi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	So Takahashi’s gonna become like Nacchi sometime too. I got to know Nacchi when she was 16, so it’s strange when she’s 23 and talking to me in front of me… Makes you think “What on earth…”. Takahashi, soon it’ll happen to you too.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	You’ll get into your twenties and become an adult.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sho-ji:	Ohh…
Sanma:	Ehhh… Even idiots become adults.
Tamai:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	That’s right. They grow older in their own stupid way.
Yaguchi:	Hehehehe(lol)
Sanma:	It’s kinda pitiable…
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	(lol) “Pitiable. Yes.”
Sanma:	Before that happens, lose your dialect already!
Takahashi:	Ehh?!
Sanma:	I’m saying that you should lose your dialect.
Takahashi:	Eh, but… I’ve lost more than half of it.
Sanma:	….(lol)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	So it was stronger earlier?
Takahashi:	I think it was.
Sanma:	(lol) Lost more than half?
Takahashi:	I did!
Yaguchi:	Not really….
Takahashi:	Eh?! No way!
Yaguchi:	(lol) Not much different than the time you joined…
Takahashi:	Eh? I changed!
Sanma:	She hasn’t changed, right?
Yaguchi:	I think she hasn’t.
Takahashi:	Eh, I totally changed!
Sanma:	So you think you’re totally speaking Tokyo dialect now?
Takahashi:	I do!
Sanma:	(lol)
Yaguchi:	Ehehehehe(lol)?
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	No way~~!
Takahashi:	I really think that! Because when I went back to my hometown during summer holidays…
Yaguchi:	Yes, yes.
Takahashi:	I was told “You… sound gross. Don’t speak that Tokyo dialect anymore!”. (in Fukui dialect)
Sanma:	(laughing all the time)
Yaguchi:	Ohh…
Takahashi:	It really was…
Sanma:	So you were told that you’ve become conceited from living in a city?
Takahashi:	Something like that!
Sanma:	That you’ve turned into a Tokyo kid?
Yaguchi:	Ehhhh~
Takahashi:	Right. I was told “What’s with you, putting on airs?!”.
Sanma:	And then? (he thinks something happened after it)
Takahashi:	Yeah…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	“And then” (lol)
Takahashi:	And then… well, nothing happened.
Tamai:	(lol) Nothing happened, right?
Sanma:	I guess nothing happened… (lol) Do your best in any case, ok?
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Takahashi:	Yes, I’ll do my best.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	We’re going into commercials.

Listener mail corner - Part Two (51′35”)

Sanma:	Listener mail corner!
Sho-ji:	Yay!
Sanma:	Part Two!
Sho-ji:	Ah!
Everyone:	Yaaay!
Sanma:	Well, since Nacchi’s not here today, we’ve extended this corner. It’s the extended version today.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	Well, seems like the director thought it would be a too big responsibility for you, Takahashi.
Takahashi:	Ara.
Yaguchi:	“Ara” Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	Yeah.
Sanma:	You can’t decide if something’s right or wrong, can you?
Takahashi:	I think I could!
Sanma:	Can you properly decide it?
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	If something’s right or wrong.
Takahashi:	But I’m indecisive when it comes to shopping.
Sanma:	What do you mean?
Takahashi:	I can’t decide if I should buy something or not.
Sanma:	You can’t decide? What kind of things for example?
Takahashi:	I really start wondering if I’ll need it or not.
Sanma:	Can’t you tell if you need something or not?
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Why wonder if you’ll need it? Didn’t you go shopping because you need it?
Takahashi:	That’s true, but you can’t know if you’ll wear it once you’ve bought it.
Sanma:	Clothes?
Sho-ji:	When you’ve bought it, you’ll wear it.
Takahashi:	I wear it when I’ve bought it, but it’s another question if I’ll use it again and again.
Sanma:	That’s… What things are we talking about?
Takahashi:	Clothes.
Sanma:	Of course you’ll wear them again and again.
Takahashi:	But aren’t the clothes you wear one-sided? Don’t you have any clothes you bought, but don’t wear?
Sanma:	Eh? Ah, of course. Well, I turn them into pajamas.
Takahashi:	Ah, you do?
Sanma:	I do.
Takahashi:	Mmm… But you don’t wear jackets, do you?
Sanma:	I wear jackets.
Takahashi:	Jackets?
Sanma:	The ones I’ve chosen.
Takahashi:	Ah, really? It happens often that I don’t wear them. So I always wonder if I’ll wear them or not.
Sanma:	But you want them, right?
Takahashi:	I want them, but I might not wear them in the end.
Sanma:	Then just wear them!
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	(lol) Yes.
Sho-ji:	You want them, right? You bought them because you wanted them, right?
Takahashi:	That’s right, but… I might have wanted them only at that moment.
Sanma:	Yeah… The same goes for everything in this world.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Hahahaha(lol) Wait a moment…
Takahashi:	You’re right.
Sanma:	I’m right, ain’t I?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	You can say the same thing about everything in this world.
Takahashi:	Yes, that’s right.
Sanma:	For example, food. It can happen that when you’ve bought a radish, you wonder “Shall I eat it? Or not?” and then throw it away in the end. Even though it’s radish.
Takahashi:	That would be a waste then.
Sanma:	Yes. That’s why you’d eat it instead, right?
Takahashi:	I would.
Sanma:	Then why don’t you just buy the jacket?
Takahashi:	Haha(lol) Yes.
Sanma:	When you think it’s better to eat it because it’d be a waste.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	You shouldn’t eat a jacket, you know?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Hahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	You’ll wear it, right?
Takahashi:	I’ll wear it!
Tamai:	Since it’s a jacket.
Takahashi:	Yes, I’ll wear it.
Sho-ji:	Because it’s a jacket.
Takahashi:	…yes.
Sanma:	You’re a little fool, huh?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	You mean me?!
Tamai:	Yep. You got one strand of hair standing out to the side too.
Takahashi:	I asked my make-up artist to make it like this.
Sanma:	Your make-up artist probably wanted us to laugh at it.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ah, is that so?
Tamai:	Wanted to add to your character.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	So why don’t you just buy the things you want?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	I think it’ll be fine.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	You also go buy things you put into your refridgerator too, right?
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	What troubles you then? Like “Shall I buy milk or not…”?
Takahashi:	Milk has this shelf life thing, right?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	And it’s quite short for milk, right?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Then I wonder if I should buy a small carton or a big one.
Sanma:	Why don’t you buy the small one?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sanma:	When you’re worried about it’s shelf life.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	And you drink it when you’ve bought it, right?
Takahashi:	Sometimes I drink it, sometimes I don’t.
Tamai:	(lol)
Sanma:	All the more reason to buy the small one.
Takahashi:	Yes. Yes, I’ll do that.
Sanma:	Good. What else do you buy?
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	What else… Mom buys almost everything for me, so…
Sanma:	You still live with your mom?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sho-ji:	That’s why you can’t lose your dialect.
Takahashi:	Ahhh…
Sanma:	Yeah. So… why don’t you let your mother buy clothes for you too?
Takahashi:	Oh, but I go shopping together with my mom.
Sanma:	And you both wonder if you should buy it or not?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Tamai:	Her mother too…
Yaguchi:	“Her mother too” (lol)
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Her mother too…
Sanma:	Is your mother another Takahashi Ai?
Takahashi:	No. She’s Takahashi Yoshimi.
Sanma:	No, not that.
Yaguchi:	AHAHAHA(LOL)
Tamai:	No, no, he didn’t mean that.
Takahashi:	Eh? (lol)
Sanma:	I know that. You wouldn’t like it if everyone in your family was called Takahashi Ai, would you?
Takahashi:	I wouldn’t like it. (lol)
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	I meant, is she someone who’s like you? Is your mother like that too?
Takahashi:	Ahhh… She is.
Sanma:	She is, huh?
Takahashi:	She asks me “Do you think I’ll wear this?”.
Sanma:	She asks you “You think I’ll wear it?”.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	And you answer “I think you’ll wear it.”?
Takahashi:	I answer “I think you will.”.
Sho-ji:	Then she says “So shall we buy this one?” and you buy it?
Takahashi:	We end up not buying that one.
Sanma:	…..
Sho-ji:	…..
Tamai:	(lol)
Takahashi:	Sometimes we do buy it though. (lol)
Sho-ji:	Ok, no shopping for you anymore.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Why’s that?!
Sanma:	It’s a pity, but…
Takahashi:	But it’s fun!
Sanma:	Yeah, but it’s an annoyance for the store too. I mean you both keep staring at one article all the time, right?
Takahashi:	That’s right…
Sanma:	Takahashi Yoshie and Ai.
Takahashi:	It’s Yoshimi. (lol)
Sanma:	Yoshimi and Ai.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	All the time, it goes like “I’ll wear this, won’t I?” “Nah, I don’t think you will.”. And “I’ll wear it!” “You won’t!”.
Takahashi:	“Let’s not buy it after all.”
Sanma:	Then you both leave the store, right?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s unbearable for the store.
Takahashi:	You’re right. (lol)
Sanma:	But since you’re still young and get such a high salary… Why don’t you just buy the clothes? If there’s something you want to buy.
Tamai:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Hmm…
Sanma:	It’s your income anyway. No one’s gonna take it away from you. Not even your family.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	That’s why you should just buy what you can afford.
Takahashi:	That’s all there is to it, huh?
Sanma:	That’s all there is to it! It’s not like you can use the money when you’re dead.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Money is for spending.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	But I’m saving up 500 yen coins!
Sanma:	Uwaa!
Sho-ji:	Uwaa~!
Sanma:	No, wait…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Same here!
Takahashi:	You do it too?!
Sho-ji:	I even bought a can too. You can save up 500.000 yen in it.
Takahashi:	No way! That’s amazing! Did you save up that much?
Sho-ji:	But I don’t put any 500 yen coins into it. Only 10 yen coins.
Sanma:	Hahaha(lol)
Yagu/Taka:	Ehhhh~~~?!
Sho-ji:	I feel sorry for the can. I bought that can thinking I’d put 500 yen coins into it, but I’ve only put 10 yen coins into it.
Sanma:	Hyaa(lol)
Sho-ji:	I’ve totally betrayed the can. That’s why I feel sorry for the can.
Takahashi:	I see…
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol) Ehhh~
Sanma:	What kind of can did you buy?
Takahashi:	A normal savings box.
Sanma:	But how many yen is it when it’s full?
Takahashi:	I don’t know that.
Sho-ji:	Is it big?
Takahashi:	Well, not that…
Sanma:	Is it for 500 yen only?
Takahashi:	Not only… It’s actually a candy can I got at my birthday. It’s one that you can use as a savings box.
Sanma:	Yeah, yeah.
Takahashi.	And I’ve been saving up in it.
Sanma:	How much have you saved up?
Takahashi:	Well, how much…
Sho-ji:	Quite a lot?
Takahashi:	Quite a lot! And mom took it home with her.
Yaguchi:	Ehhh~?!
Sanma:	Isn’t that theft?
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Takahashi:	No, it’s not! Umm… You never know when there’s gonna be an earthquake… (lol)
Yaguchi:	Ahhh, I see, I see.
Takahashi:	Mom said it’s not good to leave it at my place.
Sanma:	Eh? What?
Takahashi:	There could be an earthquake in Tokyo!
Sanma:	No, no, an earthquake could happen anywhere.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	That’s why… (lol) she said she’d put it into a bank.
Sanma:	Ah, I see, I see. If you put it into a bank… it doesn’t change anything, you know?
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	You think so?!
Tamai:	(lol)
Sanma:	…yes.
Takahashi:	So I should just leave it at home?
Tamai:	Yeah.
Sanma:	But you know, even if there’s an earthquake, the money will be okay.
Takahashi:	But if everything starts collapsing and you have to leave the house…
Sanma:	Ahh, I see.
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Takahashi:	Eh? (lol)
Sanma:	But it’s only a savings box, right?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	It can’t be a great amount of money, can it?
Takahashi:	It’s become a great amount of money!
Sanma:	About how much..?
Takahashi:	It’s a secret.
Sanma:	Ehh? About 500.000 yen?
Takahashi:	Not that much! About half of that.
Sanma:	You saved up 250.000 yen in a savings box?!
Takahashi:	About 200.000 yen.
Sanma:	It was heavy, wasn’t it?!
Takahashi:	It’s heavy.
Sanma:	You’re lying!
Takahashi:	It’s true!
Yaguchi:	Hahahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	It’s true! I mean it was quite…
Sanma:	Umm… I did that too!
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Even though I might not look like it, I have a box about this big for small change. I’ve saved up quite a bit! I’m looking forward to going to money exchange and letting it all change into bank notes.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	It’s about 30.000 or 40.000 yen and it’s already this big!
Takahashi:	But it’s all 500 yen in my case!
Sanma:	Didn’t you say you can put all kinds of coins into it?
Takahashi:	Only 500 yen. I only put 500 yen coins into it.
Sanma:	Then get yourself a savings box for 500 yen coins!
Takahashi:	Eh, but… Isn’t it better to use one I already have?
Tamai:	(lol)
Sanma:	And what do you do with the 10 yen coins etc?
Takahashi:	As for the 10 yen coins…
Sho-ji:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	I still have them.
Sho-ji:	Then give them to me.
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	I’ve been putting only 10 yen coins into mine. That’s why 500 yen coins…
Takahashi:	(lol) You’re saving 10 yen coins?
Sho-ji:	I’ve been putting only 10 yen coins into a special savings box.
Tamai:	Which is an insult for the savings box.
Sho-ji:	Inexcusable.
Takahashi:	Then I’d exchange them for 500 yen coins.
Sho-ji:	“500.000 yen” is written on it, but it’s impossible. My 10 yen coins would fill it up before it amounts to 500.000 yen.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	…yeah.
Tamai:	Yeah.
Sho-ji:	Don’t just agree with me. (lol) Don’t say “Yeah”.
Takahashi:	Yes.

fourth mail: Takahashi should say a Yantan gag in Morning Musume’s concert in Osaka Jou Hall (59′54”)

from “Momo kara umareta Kintarou” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. This weekend, there will be a Morning Musume live concert in Osaka Jou Hall. I’m sure most of the audience will be Yantan listeners. In a past concert, Ayaya sang the song, she won the “YanDo song writing championship” with, acapella. In a recent concert Gocchin said the gag “Gyuutan, yantan, nani iutan?” she learned from Sho-ji-san in a MC corner, Shiba-chan drew Sho-ji-san’s portrait in a Melon Kinenbi concert and Nacchi said the gag “Daibutsu, odabutsu, butsubutsu, kimochi warui nen!” in Nara. Now it’s Aichan’s turn. Please show us the willpower of a Yantan semi-regular. The performances on Saturday have already ended, but there’s still the morning and evening performances on Sunday left. There’ll be lots of MC segments and I’m sure you’ll have many opportunities to say a gag. Is it possible that you say something for us? Sanma-san, Sho-ji-san, by all means. Please teach her a gag as wonderful as Gocchin’s or Nacchi’s.

 

Sanma:	(lol) This is from “Momo kara umareta Kintarou”.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening.
Sanma:	“This weekend, there will be a Morning Musume live concert in Osaka Jou Hall.”
Sho-ji:	Ohh!
Sanma:	“I’m sure most of the audience will be Yantan listeners. In a past concert, Ayaya sang the song, she won the “YanDo song writing championship” with, acapella. In a recent concert Gocchin said the gag “Gyuutan, yantan, nani iutan?” she learned from Sho-ji-san in a MC corner, Shiba-chan drew Sho-ji-san’s portrait in a Melon Kinenbi concert and Nacchi said the gag “Daibutsu, odabutsu, butsubutsu, kimochi warui nen!” in Nara.”
Sho-ji:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	She did?!
Sanma:	They all did it.
Yagu/Taka:	Amazing!
Sanma:	“Now it’s Aichan’s turn.”
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	“Please show us the willpower of a Yantan semi-regular. The performances on Saturday have already ended, but there’s still the morning and evening performances on Sunday left.”
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“There’ll be lots of MC segments and I’m sure you’ll have many opportunities to say a gag. Is it possible that you do something for us? Sanma-san, Sho-ji-san, by all means. Please teach her a gag as wonderful as Gocchin’s or Nacchi’s.”
Takahashi:	Hm.
Yaguchi:	I see…
Sanma:	When Nacchi said that line the other day, almost everyone in the audience was a Yantan listener. That’s why you should do something too. There are MC segments, right?
Yaguchi:	There are, there are.
Sanma:	An opportunity to say something.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	How long can you talk there?
Takahashi:	I wonder how long…
Yaguchi:	But there are corners too. Something like game corners.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Ohh, and can you set up a joke for each other?
Takahashi:	We can.
Sanma:	So Takahashi, you’ll get to hold a mic and talk?
Takahashi:	I will.
Sanma:	What kind of corners are they? Those game corners.
Yaguchi:	Oogiri. (A leader asks a question or poses a challenge with a set limit, and the player with the best answer gets points.)
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Oogiri?
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ah, if it’s oogiri, then you have to come up with an own line, right? Like in the “a-i-u-e-o sentences” game. (the players have to make up funny sentences that start with a, i, u, e, o.)
Takahashi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	What kind of game will you play?
Takahashi:	“Forbidden.”
Sho-ji:	What’s that about?
Sanma:	“Forbidden”?
Takahashi:	We have to say “[Something] is forbidden”.
Sanma:	Hmm?
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Takahashi:	We have to imagine there’s a poster saying “[Something] is forbidden.”.
Sanma:	Ahhh!
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	And you have to make up what’s forbidden?
Yaguchi:	Right.
Sanma:	“[Something] is forbidden!”
Yaguchi:	That’s right. You say “There’s a poster [somewhere].” before it.
Sanma:	Ahh, I see, I see. Then you have to come up with a funny line.
Takahashi:	Right.
Sanma:	Then why don’t you use that opportunity? “[Something] is forbidden.”
Takahashi:	Yes!
Yaguchi:	Ah! Awesome!
Takahashi:	Yay!
Sanma:	So “[Something] is forbidden.”, huh?
Takahashi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	“[Something] is forbidden.”, huh? Ehh… What would be good…
Takahashi:	What would be good…
Yaguchi:	It’s quite difficult, isn’t it?
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	So something like a poster saying “Salarymen”… no, “Salesmen are not wanted.”, right?
Takahashi:	Right.
Sanma:	So you could like make a joke with “Godzilla not wanted.”.
Yaguchi:	Umm…
Sanma:	Or “Mothers not wanted.”.
Yaguchi:	For example… “There was a poster at an eat-while-standing Soba restaurant. It said ‘Eating while sitting is forbidden.’.”. Something along these lines.
Sanma:	Ahhh, I understand!
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Takahashi:	“There was a sticker on Ultraman. It says ‘Going home after 3 minutes is forbidden.’.”. (Shin Hayata can transform into Ultraman for 3 minutes only.)
Sanma:	Ah, I understand. You have to add something before “[Something] is forbidden.”.
Takahashi:	That’s right.
Yaguchi:	You have to say where the poster/sticker is pasted at.
Sanma:	Ah, I understand. This is something for Murakami-san.
Sho-ji:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Ahahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Please help me.
Sho-ji:	Eh, let’s see. “There’s a sticker on Takahashi’s back.”
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sho-ji:	……………………
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	“It says ‘Saronpasu is not wanted’.”
Yaguchi:	(rofl)
Takahashi:	Yes!
Yaguchi:	“Yes”? (lol)
Sho-ji:	“Yes”? You’ll be the one to say it.
Yaguchi:	(lol) You’re really going to say it?
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sho-ji:	No, let’s think about it a bit more!
Yaguchi:	Ahahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	You already said “yes”… Let’s think about it a bit more.
Yaguchi:	You’ll say it in Osaka Jou Hall, you know?
Takahashi:	You mean I shouldn’t say this?
Sho-ji:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Ok!
Sanma:	Well, you can say this part. “There was a sticker on Takahashi’s back.”
Takahashi:	Ah!
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sanma:	How about “I can’t read it!”?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	“There’s a poster on my back. I… I can’t read it!”.
Takahashi:	Ohhhh!
Yaguchi:	Ahh!
Takahashi:	That’s good!
Yaguchi:	That’s good! Really good! I see…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	It’s good!
Yaguchi:	“I… I can’t read it!” Hihihi(lol)
Sanma:	Yeah. “There’s a poster on my back. I… I can’t read it!”.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	You have to add appropriate movements too, Takahashi.
Yaguchi:	Awesome, awesome!
Takahashi:	Oh! Ok!
Sanma:	You’re really gonna say that?
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	Ok? Ahh…
Sho-ji:	“There’s a sticker on Takahashi’s back.”.
Yaguchi:	I see…
Takahashi:	That was good!
Sanma:	Ah, really? (lol)
Yaguchi:	Ahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	I wish they had such a topic in an oogiri.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	I think I’d get the highest score then.
Sanma:	Hyaa(lol) That kinda reminds me of my old gang.
Takahashi:	Amazing…
Yaguchi:	We always have a hard time coming up with these lines.
Sanma:	Ahh…
Sho-ji:	You have to come up with them yourselves?
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sho-ji:	That’s admirable…
Takahashi:	There’s also a game where you have to look at a picture and say the first thing that comes to your mind.
Yaguchi:	You have to fill the speech bubbles in the picture.
Sanma:	Ah, filling speech bubbles, yes. We used to do that a lot in earlier times as a massage for the brain.
Takahashi:	I’m not very good at it.
Sanma:	You’re not?
Takahashi:	No.
Sanma:	You shouldn’t take oogiri too lightly. That’s why you have to come up with jokes beforehand.
Yaguchi:	Ah, is that so?
Sanma:	Yeah, the first 3 members should have their jokes ready and the 4th one can start ad-libbing. I mean when everyone tries to come up with ad-lib jokes, it’ll definitely become messy. And you can’t say it out loud either because you don’t have enough self-confidence.
Sho-ji:	It’s also important that you say exactly what you’ve planned beforehand.

• talk about how Sho-ji messed up in a oogiri game:
  • Sho-ji was supposed to say “shika no tsuno” and Kanpei-san was supposed to say “gojira no tsuno.
  • However Sho-ji said “shikibou” instead and Kanpei-san was forced to quickly improvise and ended up saying “gorira no tsuno“.

Takahashi:	You’re right. That means the first 3 members should stick to the plan. (6′26”)
Sanma:	Actually yes.
Sho-ji:	The 2nd member can improvise a bit.
Sanma:	He can. But someone like you doesn’t have enough self-confidence, so it’s probably better if you don’t.
Sho-ji:	Yes.
Sanma:	Shall we play the song now?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Yes. (lol)
Takahashi:	That’s right! (takes out CDs) Here you go.
Yaguchi:	Here’s our new CD.
Sanma:	A single?
Yaguchi:	Yes. It still hasn’t been released yet though.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	It’ll be released on November 3rd.
Sanma:	Haaa… Another new single?
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	So you’ll play this song now?
Takahashi:	That’s right. Then please listen to the following song. It’ll be released on November 3rd. Morning Musume’s…
Yagu/Taka:	“Namida ga Tomaranai Houkago” (lol)
Yaguchi:	Wait a sec… (lol)

Song: Morning Musume’s 「Namida ga Tomaranai Houkago」 (67′02”)

“Listener wo iyashitai!” corner (68′37”)

• The bg music of the title call is Natsumi Abe’s “Datte Ikitekanakucha”

Tamai:	“Listener wo iyashitai!” corner!!
Everyone:	Yaay!
Sanma:	Ehh… I wonder how Yaguchi will do in this corner…
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Will she be able to heal? Honestly…
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol) Well… It will be alright.
Sanma:	Give it your all. How many phrases do we have today?
Tamai:	2 each.
Sanma:	2 each. Takahashi, you have to display the skills of a veteran here.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Yaguchi:	Hehehe(lol)
Takahashi:	I’ll do my best!
Sanma:	Now, decide who’ll start with janken.
Yagu/Taka:	Yes!
Sanma:	First the stone!
Yagu/Taka:	Jankenpo!
Yaguchi:	It’s a draw, it’s a draw… Yes, I won!
Takahashi:	Ah… I lost.
Sanma:	First or last?
Yaguchi:	Ehh… I want to see my senpai do it first!
Sanma:	Ah!
Takahashi:	AH~~~!!!
Sanma:	You’re right, you’re right.
Takahashi:	Yes… I’ll do my best…
Yaguchi:	I’ll go last.
Sanma:	Though this senpai is rather unreliable…
Yaguchi:	Hehehe(lol)
Takahashi:	You think so?!
Sanma:	Of course! I say it every week!
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ok, let’s start.
Takahashi:	This is from “Zerachin taisou”-san in Sakai city.
Sanma:	Isn’t it “taishitsu”?
Takahashi:	It’s “taisou”.
Sanma:	Ah, so he changed his name. (lol)
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Zerachin”-san changed his name.

Takahashi: 「Yeees! Here you have a large serving of Aichan!」 (69′30”~)

Takahashi:	Yeees! Here you have a large serving of Aichan! (01′01”)
Yaguchi:	Hahahahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	….(lol)
Yaguchi:	Huh? They all froze. Huh?
Sanma:	It’s a corner where you’re supposed to heal, you know?!
Takahashi:	I already know that!
Sanma:	How many times do I have to tell you until you understand?
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	How many times do I have to tell you? Tell me how many times and I’ll tell you that many times.
Takahashi:	Yes! I’ll do my best!
Tamai:	You have to tell him how many times.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	…So how many times?!
Takahashi:	Eh? (lol) How many times?
Sanma:	How many times do I have to tell you until you’re satisfied?
Takahashi:	….until I understand it.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Then you’ll have to tell her quite many times.
Sanma:	Yeah, looks like it.
Tamai:	Extremely many times.
Sanma:	Like I said…
Takahashi:	Yes?
Sanma:	What.. what was the phrase about? “Large serving”?
Takahashi:	“Large serving”, yes.
Sanma:	Large serving of what?
Takahashi:	“Yees! Here’s a large serving of Aichan!”
Sanma:	“Yees! Here’s a large serving of Aichan…”. Try saying it in a sexy way.
Takahashi:	Eh, how do I say this in a sexy way?
Sanma:	Like “Yees~ Here’s a large serving of Aichan~”.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	“A large serving~”
Sanma:	Yeah, try it again.
Takahashi:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Yeees!
Sanma:	No, no, no…
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	It’s weird from the beginning.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	It sounded like “Yeees!”.
Sanma:	Didn’t I just tell you how to say it?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	No, don’t say “yes”.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	How many times do I have to tell you?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sanma:	Not “yes”. How many times do I have to tell you?
Takahashi:	Until I understand it.
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Then… please tell her again.
Sanma:	“Yees~” “Yees~”
Takahashi:	“Yees~”
Sanma:	“Yees~”
Takahashi:	“Yees~”
Sanma:	Say it like “Here’s a large serving of Aichan~”.
Sho-ji:	Right, right.
Sanma:	In a sexy way.
Yaguchi:	Ohhh…
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Then, here you go.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Yeees~
Sanma:	I had enough.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	(lol) Eh? Why? Why?
Sanma:	I had enough!
Yaguchi:	Ehhh~ So strict~!!
Sanma:	Yeah, enough! Yaguchi, hurry up!
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol) Yes. You’re so strict~~!!!
Takahashi:	He really is.
Sanma:	Of course I am!
Yaguchi:	Is this for real?!
Sanma:	I get mad because this aho can’t get it right!
Yaguchi:	Ah, really… Then I’ll…
Takahashi:	I’m not an aho!
Sanma:	Then you’re someone who acts like one!
Takahashi:	I’m a baka.
Yaguchi:	…(lol)
Sanma:	Baaka!
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	No, don’t say “yes” there. (lol)
Takahashi:	Please go on.
Sanma:	(lol) Hurry up.
Yaguchi:	Yes. This is from “Densetsu no aoJAAJI”-san in Yamaguchi prefecture.

• As to why Takahashi prefers being called baka instead of aho:
  • To be honest, I don’t really understand it myself. Takahashi should know that “baka” means “complete idiot” in Osaka dialect and is much more insulting than “aho”. Thus you rarely hear Sanma calling someone “baka” while he calls others “aho” 24/7. Please msg me if you have an answer to this.

Yaguchi: 「It’s ok. Today you can do anything you like.」 (71′41”~)

Yaguchi:	It’s ok. Today you can do anything you like. …….pffftt! Hahahaha(lol) This is so embarrassing!! (03′08”)
Sanma:	Yaguchi, that wasn’t how you’re supposed to say that, was it? He can do anything he likes today. Right?
Yaguchi:	(lol) Yes. So it wasn’t good?
Sanma:	Not good, not good. Say it in a sexier way.
Yaguchi:	Ehh?! Sexier?!
Sanma:	You’re already 21 now. Already an adult.
Tamai:	Let’s heal.
Yaguchi:	Haaa~ I broke out in a sweat there!
Tamai:	Let’s heal.
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Now in a sexier way.
Yaguchi:	Yes, got it.
	(the music box plays)
Yaguchi:	It’s ok~ Today you can do anything you like~ (SEXY BEEAAAAAM)
Takahashi:	UOOOOHHH!!!
Yaguchi:	Uoohhh! I feel sick!!! Hahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	(lol)
Sanma:	(lol) What’s that “uoooh” about?
Takahashi:	Hmm?
Sanma:	This is how you do it.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sho-ji:	Right, right.
Sanma:	This is what heals the listeners.
Yaguchi:	Really?!
Tamai:	Let’s heal the listeners.
Takahashi:	That was very sexy!!
Yaguchi:	Iyaaaa~ So embarrassing!!
Sanma:	This is what you’re supposed to do. You’re not supposed to be surprised and go “Uooooh!”.
Takahashi:	I could never say it like this!
Sanma:	Then make more effort so you can do it one day. I’ve always said this though.
Takahashi:	Eh, how?! That was amazing!
Yaguchi:	(lol) No, not at all… (lol)
Sanma:	You can do it!
Sho-ji:	You have to make effort for it.
Takahashi:	Then I’ll make more effort!
Sanma:	Next one.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	This is from “Aguri-san” in Okayama prefecture.
Sanma:	Try to say that in a sexy way too!
Takahashi:	This is from… “Aguri-san” in Okayama prefecture~ (SEXY MODE ON!)
Sanma:	That’s it! That’s it! You can do it! You can do it! You can do it!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Say it like that one more time, hurry up!
Takahashi:	This is from… “Aguri-san” in Okayama prefecture~

Takahashi: 「Jouzu ni naritai naa…」 (73′04”~)

Takahashi:	Jouzu ni naritai na(lol) (04′28”)
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol) Wait a sec…
Takahashi:	Not good! I’ll try one more time!
Yaguchi:	They all froze. (lol)
Takahashi:	Can I try it one more time?
Sanma:	(pissed off) Of course!
Takahashi:	This is from… “Aguri-san” in Okayama prefecture~
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Jouzu ni naritai naa…
Yaguchi:	Hahahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	At penmanship?
Takahashi:	(lol) Eh?!
Sho-ji:	What?
Takahashi:	But didn’t you tell me that it’s better to say it like this?!
Tamai:	She almost spluttered too.
Sanma:	Like “Jouzu ni naritai na”.
Takahashi:	“Jouzu ni naritai na”
Sanma:	No, you don’t have to imitate my Osaka dialect too. (lol)
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sanma:	Don’t imitate the unimportant parts.
Takahashi:	Yes. Yes.
Sanma:	“Jouzu ni naritai naaa~”
Takahashi:	(imitating him) “Jouzu ni naritai naaa~”
Sanma:	No, no, not like that.
Yaguchi:	(lol)
Sanma:	Don’t imitate the way I said the word endings.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Imitate the sound.
Takahashi:	The sound?
Sanma:	“Jouzu ni naritai naa~”
Takahashi:	“Ouuh”
Sanma:	No, not “Ouuh”!
Tamai:	“Ouuh” (lol)
Sanma:	“Jouzu ni naritai na~”
Takahashi:	“Jouuzu ni~”
Sanma:	“Jouzu ni~”
Takahashi:	“Joou~”
Everyone:	(lol)
Yaguchi:	(lol) Her voice.. her voice is becoming strange.
Takahashi:	(lol)
Sanma:	“Jouzu ni naritai naa~”
Takahashi:	“Joouzu~”
Sanma:	Ah! How do you say “good, skilled” on the countryside?
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	How do you say “good, skilled” in your hometown? “I want to become good at it”
Takahashi:	“Jouzu ni“…
Sanma:	Eh?
Takahashi:	“Umaku“…
Sanma:	Which one?
Takahashi:	Uh, eh?
Tamai:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Do you use both?
Takahashi:	“Umaku”.
Sanma:	And what about “to become”?
Takahashi:	Umaku naritai.
Sanma:	Ah, that’s better. “Umaku naritai”. That in a sexy way. “Umaku naritai~”
Takahashi:	“Umaku naritai~”
Sanma:	Yeah, that, that’s it, that’s it!
Takahashi:	Ouu!
Sanma:	Try it one more time! Hurry, yeah, yeah.
Takahashi:	Yes!
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Umaku naritai…
Everyone:	(lol)
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol) Cuuute!
Sanma:	But you’re NOT becoming any better! You’re not becoming any better!
Yaguchi:	(lol) Huh? So strict~!
Takahashi:	Ehhh… Why?
Yaguchi:	Waah.. So strict~!
Takahashi:	I don’t get it.
Sanma:	Yaguchi, I’m counting on you now. I’m sorry.
Takahashi:	Yes, please.
Yaguchi:	Ehhhh?!
Sanma:	It’s inexcusable that I’m counting on someone who’s doing it the first time.
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	You’re like Kokubo from the Giants now.
Yaguchi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s inexcusable to put all the responsibility on a new member.
Yaguchi:	No, no. (lol)
Takahashi:	I’m sorry.
Yaguchi:	I’ll do my best! Yes.
Sanma:	It’s all because you don’t do it properly!
Yaguchi:	Ehh.. Let’s see… (lol) He’s mad at her. Ok, here I go.
Sanma:	Do it properly!
Takahashi:	Yes, I’ll do my best.
Yaguchi:	(lol) This is from “Killer Khan”-san in Itami City, Hyougo prefecture.

Yaguchi: 「Tell me where it feels good.」 (75′17”~)

Yaguchi:	Tell me where it feels good. Pffft(lol) Uwaaa, I got goosebumps! (6′44”)
Sanma:	No, no, Yaguchi, not like that.
Yaguchi:	That wasn’t good? Ahhh, so embarrassing!
Sanma:	“Tell me where it feels good.” “Tell me where it feels good~”
Yaguchi:	Hihihhihi(lol)
Takahashi:	Hyahyahya(lol)
Yaguchi:	I got it, yes. Ehh…
Takahashi:	(lol) Funny…
Sanma:	It’s not funny.
Takahashi:	But… (lol)
Sho-ji:	It’s not a funny corner.
Sanma:	It’s not a funny corner.
Yagu/Taka:	(lol)
Sanma:	I’m counting on you, Yaguchi.
Yaguchi:	Yes, I got it.
Takahashi:	Please.
Yaguchi:	Here I go!
	(the music box plays)
Yaguchi:	Tell me where it feels good~
Sanma:	No, no.
Yaguchi:	Pffft(lol) This is embarrassing! (lol)
Sanma:	What’s wrong?!
Yaguchi:	(lol) So embarrassing! Ok! Ok!
Sanma:	“Where… Hey, tell me where it feels good.”
Yaguchi:	“Hey, tell me where it feels good.”
Sanma:	Right, right.
Yaguchi:	Yes, yes, I got it. Ok, here I go!
	(the music box plays)
Yaguchi:	Hey… Tell me where it feels good.
Sanma:	Not in such a fresh way! Really!!!
Sho-ji:	Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Yaguchi:	(to Takahashi) (lol) Help me! Help me!
Takahashi:	(panicking) It wasn’t good? Why wasn’t it good?
Sanma:	Eh? Takahashi, try saying that line.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Yaguchi:	Aichan, Aichan, do it.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Tell me where it feels good. (O_O)
Sanma:	Ohhh! Goood!
Yagu/Taka:	Uooooh!
Sanma:	That was good! Good, good!
Takahashi:	This is it? This is it?
Sanma:	Yeah! You’ve gradually improved! One more time, one more time, one more time!
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Tell me where it feels good.
Sho-ji:	Goooood!
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Waaah!!! I did it!
Tamai:	Hahahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	I had enough! The end!
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	He got mad at us.
Sanma:	Of course I did!
Yaguchi:	Ahahaha(lol)

Karaoke Box 「Sanchama」 (76′43”)

Sanma:	Karaoke Box Sanchama~!!
Everyone:	Yaaay!
Sanma:	Well then, will we make it in time?
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Tamai no scandal”.
Tamai:	Yes. We received the lyrics from “Kimura-san no Chocoball”-san.
Sanma:	Yeah. It’s a parody of the Checkers’ “Ano ko to scandal”.
Tamai:	Yes.

• 「Tamai no scandal」 (parody of Checkers’ 「Ano ko to scandal」) Tamai sings it

Translation: (00′15”) A kiss on the road WOW WOW WOW You can’t do that! Scandal! No matter how much you love her You never know who might see it! 10 years ago, at end of year You kissed her on the jam-packed Shibuya-Tokyu Honten street intersection That person was watching you from his car With a broad grin on his face That person was Sanma-san Tamai stood there paralyzed And said “Good morning” with a trembling voice It just wouldn’t disappear, this scandal In that week’s Yantan Sanma was acting like nothing happened But the moment of relief didn’t last long When the show started, he exposed it all on air Even Noriko was shocked by this scandal When the YanMusu change WOW WOW WOW Sanma brings it up again and again, this scandal And everytime they all scream out loud, always Ten years have passed since then WOW WOW WOW It leaves a trauma on everyone, this scandal You should let it rest by now Cry cry cry It made him look like a VIP, Tamai’s scandal Roma-ji: Rojou de KISU wo WOW WOW WOW Shicha ikenai ze SUKYANDARU Ikura suki de mo dare ni mirareru ka wakaranai Juunenmae no nenmatsu ni Kuchidzuke shita ne noukou na Shibuya Toukyuu Honten doori kousaten Ano hito ga kuruma de Niyari waratte miteru Sono hito wa Sanma-san Tamai chokuritsufudou “Ohayou gozaimasu” to itta douyou Kienai SUKYANDARU Sono shuu no Yantan de Sanma shirankao shiteru Hotto shita no mo tsuka no ma Honban hajimaru to douji ni Denpa ni nosete barasare Noriko mo hiiteta SUKYANDARU YanMusu ga kawaru to WOW WOW WOW Sanma ga barasu SUKYANDARU Sono tabi ni minna himei wo ageru yo kanarazu Juunen tatte WOW WOW WOW TORAUMA nokoru SUKYANDARU Sorosoro sotto shite oite kure yo Cry cry cry Doerai hito ni mirareta Tamai no SUKYANDARU (from “Kimura-san no Chocoball”)

 

Sanma:	Yaay, yaay! (02′39”)
Tamai:	Thank you very much!
Sanma:	10 years have passed, huh?
Yaguchi:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	Commercials.

Ending (79′31”)

Sanma:	Well, Yaguchi-san, thank you for everything today.
Yaguchi:	Thank you very much!
Sanma:	How was it?
Yaguchi:	I’ve learned a lot!
Sanma:	Appearing in Yantan after 6 years.
Yaguchi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ehh… So you were 15 at that time?
Yaguchi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	Hyaa(lol)
Sho-ji:	Waah…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Yaguchi:	The years really passed in a flash and now I’m 21.
Sanma:	Yeah… From 15 years old to 21 years old…
Yaguchi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	Everything’s completely different, isn’t it? The way it feels to be in this studio and to be talking to us here.
Yaguchi:	It’s different, yeah.
Sanma:	That time you came here without a clue about anything. I bet.
Yaguchi:	Yes. I was so nervous…
Sanma:	Yeah.
Yaguchi:	I think I didn’t say much. Only one or two words.
Sanma:	Yeah, for sure.
Yaguchi:	I think I was totally overwhelmed.
Sanma:	Yeah… Time really passed in a flash.
Yaguchi:	(lol) Yes.
Sanma:	I think being 18 years old and 21 years old are worlds apart.
Yaguchi:	Yes, it’s different.
Sanma:	When you’re 18, you’re not a child anymore, but not an adult either. But when you’re 21, you’re an adult after all.
Yaguchi:	That’s right.
Sanma:	Ehh… Well then, you’ve worked hard today, Yaguchi-san.
Yaguchi:	Thank you very much!
Sanma:	Please come again!
Yaguchi:	I will!
Sanma:	Ehh… Well then, that was Akashiya Sanma.
Tamai:	Tamai Kenji.
Sho-ji:	Murakami Sho-ji.
Takahashi:	From Morning Musume, Takahashi Ai and…
Yaguchi:	…Yaguchi Mari!
Sanma:	Let’s meet next week again. Goodbye~!
Everyone:	Goodbye~!
Takahashi:	Bye bye~!

• Ending song is The Eagles’ “Take it Easy”

(Translator’s note: No Japanese log this time.)

Notes

• 2004-10-09 「MBS YoungTown Doyoubi」 Official Site
• participants: Akashiya Sanma, Murakami Sho-ji, Tamai Kenji
• YanMusume: Fujimoto Miki (14th appearance), Takahashi Ai (19th appearance)

What’s the real reason for Mikitty’s absence? Playing golf and baseball with a bone fracture… In Mikitty’s solo radio show… “Boke lectureship returns!” with Fujimoto & Takahashi Sanma-san gets mad at Takahashi Ai in “Iyashitai”!? ~~from the YanDo staff message board~~

Digest

• Opening
  • Sanma talks about Bobby Ologun getting a black belt in Judo
  • Sanma talks about moments when he wasn’t treated like the big shot he is
• Listener mail corner (18′54”)
  • [Subject] Fujimoto took a break because of bad physical condition (19′03”)
    • Fujimoto was hospitalized and had a break of one week because of a tough cold
    • Sanma doesn’t believe that it was “only” a cold
  • [Subject] Takahashi served as a pinch hitter in Fujimoto’s radio show (32′59”)
    • Takahashi brought the Kona coffee she bought in Hawaii
    • lots of talk about Kona coffee with vanilla flavor =P
  • [Subject] Sanma used Fujimoto’s imitation of Setsuko in Athens (42′58”)
    • Sanma and Takahashi try to impersonate many different stars
  • [Subject] Fujimoto’s portrait of Sanma (48′34”)
    • Fujimoto shows the portrait of Sanma she drew in her radio show
• The “boke lectureship returns” corner (52′04”)
  • pattern: “Quietly peep into the school of killifish. All the killifish are XXXing.” (53′09”)
  • pattern: “Please let me take a break from YanDo.” (56′09”)
• Song: Tsunku with Takahashi Ai 「LOVE~since 1999~」 (60′39”)
• “Listener wo iyashitai” corner (63′01”)
  • [Takahashi]
    • 「Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”. I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!」 (65′20”~)
    • 「Don’t look!」 (70′40”~)
  • [Fujimoto]
    • 「Hey… Why don’t you tell me?」 (68′24”~)
    • 「Darling, you really are an idiot~!」 (73′18”~)
• Karaoke Box 「Sanchama」 (75′34”)
  • 「Sanma Tomorrow never knows」 (parody of Mr.Children 「Tomorrow never knows」) Tamai sings it
• Ending (79′13”)
  • talk about how Fujimoto’s completely recovered now

Detailed description

[Please click here to download the whole episode as a mp3-file.]

Opening

• Sanma’s opening talk:
• Bobby easily got a black belt in judo
  • apparently famous judoka Koga Toshihiko trained him for a day
  • he’s going to try out K-1 by the end of the year too
  • he already had a special match against Royce Gracie, but Royce started bleeding from his face because of a weird elbow move by Bobby and most of the match wasn’t aired since the champion shouldn’t be bleeding in a show match against an amateur
  • getting him to fight against Bobby cost TBS a lot of money

Sanma:	Well, it costs money. It costs a lot of money. (4′58”)
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Like when you invite famous musicians to your show you’d have to rent a whole hotel floor.
Fujimoto:	Mmm…
Sanma:	Eh, Momusu hasn’t reached that level yet, huh?
Fujimoto:	Even if Morning Musume doesn’t rent a whole floor, we’d still need many rooms because we have so many members.
Sanma:	Then it’s almost like you rented a whole floor, huh?
Fujimoto:	Yes, it’s like we rented the whole thing. (lol)
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sho-ji:	But you’re still not at that level yet. Our Sanma-san is at a much higher level, right?
Fujimoto:	He rents a whole floor?
Sho-ji:	He even rented the room of a waitress!
Sanma:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Wooow~
Sho-ji:	A room with an old crappy TV.
Fujimoto:	Eh, and that’s better?
Tamai:	The cushion had a cigarette hole.
Fujimoto:	Ehhh…
Sho-ji:	You have to go at least that far to be on the same level as him.
Tamai:	Yeah!
Sho-ji:	You’re still half-baked.
Fujimoto:	Ahh…
Takahashi:	We’re still not there yet.
Sho-ji:	Seriously.
Fujimoto:	Then we’ll do our best.

• when Sanma, Hazama Kanpei and Sho-ji checked into a hotel for a one night stay in Niigata, someone at the reception came running and offered Sanma “the best suite” of the hotel
  • but that person had mistaken the room number and Sanma got the room of a waitress (the size of about 6 tatami ~ 10 m², a little TV and waitress uniforms in the closet)
  • later when they were recording a TV show in the hotel, Sanma described the room he got when he heard Hazama and Sho-ji talk about how great their rooms are
  • after the recording, Sanma and the others left the hotel instead of staying over night, but that was a mistake because the person responsible for the mistake got a lot of trouble afterwards and Sanma still receives apology letters from the hotel and gifts (4 bottles of sake made of Niigata rice, ball-point pens and key chains with the name of the hotel)
  • Sho-ji says that he would have loved to stay because he was in a real suite
• other moments when Sanma wasn’t treated like the big shot he is:
  • when Sanma, Sho-ji and another comedian were asked “Hello! Are you construction workers?” by a MBS guard
  • when a couple didn’t recognize him and asked him to take a picture of them and gave him their camera
  • when someone who wanted to become Sanma’s disciple accidentally said “I’ll make you my disciple!” instead of “Can I become your disciple?”
  • when he kept ordering sake late in an inn, the old waitress got tired and just went home and Sanma waited for his sake all night long
• after working in show business for 30 years, Sanma’s the most recognized comedian in Japan (97.6% recognition rate), but there are still lots of people in isolated regions of Japan (like Hokkaido) who don’t recognize him

Sanma:	When I went to a store I know, they brought lots of dishes to me. “Please eat this steamed Matsutake soup.” and “Please eat this.” and so on. (13′42”)
Fujimoto:	Yes, yes.
Sanma:	I said “Thank you, thank you” and ate all of it, but it was all listed in the receipt in the end.
Tamai:	Hahahaha(lol)
Fuji/Taka:	Ehhhh?!
Fujimoto:	That’s crazy!
Takahashi:	That’s a crime, isn’t it?
Sho-ji:	It’s not a crime. (lol) It’s not a crime. They didn’t say it was for free.
Sanma:	(lol) They didn’t.
Takahashi:	Ah, I see.
Fujimoto:	Ehh…
Sanma:	When I said “Hey, it’s all listed in the receipt!!”, they answered “Come on, we know you have the money.”.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Ehhhh~~
Sanma:	The store was in more need of money than I was. (lol) And they went bankrupt by now.
Takahashi:	I see.
Sanma:	Yeah. It was probably their last struggle against bankruptcy. “Let’s get all the money out of Sanma.” (lol)
Tamai:	(lol)
Sanma:	They brought lots of stuff I didn’t order! I said “Thank you…”… It was all Matsutake dishes by the way. (lol)
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	While eating it I thought “It would cost me a lot of money if I had ordered all this…” and it really cost me a lot.
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Ehhh…
Sho-ji:	Well, that happens to Sanma-san because people know that he’s got money. When I go to an expensive restaurant, I say this beforehand. “Tell me directly if you bring me something that costs more than 500 yen.”
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	I say it beforehand.
Tamai:	You’re quick!
Sho-ji:	I’m quick.
Fujimoto:	500 yen, huh… (lol)
Sho-ji:	It’s because I’m scared! (lol)
Sanma:	(lol) This guy isn’t joking. He’s really serious. Sometimes I’m scared of him.
Sho-ji:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	He makes weird accusations and demands melon service.
Takahashi:	Ohoho(lol)
Fujimoto:	Ehhh~
Sanma:	And it makes me look uncool. Asking stuff like “Don’t we get melon service?”. He asks that in the restaurant I often go to. “We’ve ordered so much, don’t we get melon service soon?”.
Sho-ji:	And you know? They really give you melon service then.
Takahashi:	Hahahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Unbelieveable, but true.
Fujimoto:	Heee~
Sho-ji:	Also when I ask “And you also give ice cream for free, right?”, they really give you ice cream for free.
Takahashi:	That’s amazing!
Sho-ji:	Isn’t it?
Sanma:	Sometimes he eats everything on his plate, licks it clean and says “You brought me this plate a while ago, but nothing was on it.”. And once he actually got another serving of the same dish!
Takahashi:	Ehhhhh~~!!
Fujimoto:	Amazing!
Takahashi:	But that’s a crime, isn’t it?
Sho-ji:	It’s not a crime.
Takahashi:	No way!!
Sho-ji:	Seriously. I’m serious.
Takahashi:	….
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Amazing…
Sanma:	It really happened.
Fujimoto:	And how did the waiter react?
Sanma:	He said “AH, I’M SO SORRY!”.
Takahashi:	Ehhh?!
Sanma:	And Sho-ji’s like “There wasn’t anything on the plate.”.
Takahashi:	Ehhhh?! (lol)
Sanma:	He wanted another serving because it was delicious.
Sho-ji:	It was. Also when I say “This is less than I had last time!”, they bring you more of it.

• the store “Jojoen Yugentei” Sanma often goes to changed it’s beer glasses and Sanma found out that the new beer glasses are smaller than the old ones even though the prize is still the same
  • after complaining about it, Sanma’s now the only customer who still gets beer in the old glass

Listener mail corner (18′54”)

first mail: Fujimoto took a break because of bad physical condition (19′03”)

from “Hakumai Ramen” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. Fujimoto Miki-san is in YanDo this week, but last week she couldn’t take part in several activities including the concerts due to bad physical condition… I’m glad that she’s healthy and back again. Last month she didn’t take part in the only Yantan she was supposed to appear in either. I think that was a mistake. What I mean is Nacchi who once appeared in Yando with a slight cold felt a lot better in the ending and said “I feel like I’ve completely recovered.”. That’s right. The talk in Yantan is a medicine that works better than any medicine in the world. And Sanma-san liked her voice which was hoarse due to the cold and it gave her an advantage in the Iyashitai corner. If you should become sick in the future, please try to endure it and appear in Yando.

 

Sanma:	Listener mail corner!!
Everyone:	Yaaay!
Sanma:	This is from “Hyakumai ramen” in Hyougo prefecture.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Eh… “Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening.
Sanma:	“Fujimoto Miki-san is in YanDo this week, but last week she couldn’t take part in several activities including the concerts due to bad physical condition…”
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Oh! Bad physical condition?!
Sho-ji:	It was in the newspapers!
Sanma:	No way! It was in the papers?
Sho-ji:	It was in the newspapers!
Fujimoto:	Yes. Yes, I’m sorry.
Sanma:	Why… You should have told us! Well, you don’t have to apologize, but…
Fujimoto:	I… I couldn’t come to one Yantan recording either.
Sanma:	You couldn’t?
Fujimoto:	I couldn’t.
Sho-ji:	As mentioned in the mail.
Sanma:	As mentioned in the mail… Ah, right, Nacchi was here all alone.
Takahashi:	I was here too!
Sanma:	You were not.
Takahashi:	I was here!!
Sanma:	We’re talking about last week’s recording, right?
Takahashi:	No, the week before last.
Sanma:	Yes, you were here the week before last.
Takahashi:	….I was, right?
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	But last week, Nacchi was here alone.
Takahashi:	Ah…
Sanma:	At that time…
Takahashi:	At that time, Miki-chan was already back.
Fujimoto:	I was already back. Aichan and I always come here together and Aichan probably came alone once.
Sanma:	Ahh… I see, I see.
Fujimoto:	That was when I couldn’t come.
Sanma:	Why? What was the reason? Some kind of a mental problem?
Fujimoto:	(lol) No, no, I just had a cold… Seems like I had the cold virus and my fever wouldn’t go down for a week.
Sanma:	It’s because you live an easy life.
Fujimoto:	I don’t~!!
Sanma:	You lack fighting spirit! Normally you don’t simply catch a cold during work!
Fujimoto:	But I did…
Sanma:	It only happened because you’re spoiled and have an easy life!
Fujimoto:	…. (lol)
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Why’s that?!
Sho-ji:	Eat oranges and run towards the sun!
Sanma:	Run towards the sun! Climb to a high place! Somewhere closer to the sun.
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	There should be high places in your neighborhood.
Sanma:	“Neighborhood” (lol)
Sho-ji:	Places you could climb on.
Fujimoto:	There aren’t…
Sanma:	That way you’d never catch a cold. Eat oranges all the time!
Fujimoto:	Ehhh… Why oranges?
Sanma:	Because of the vitamin C! You caught a cold because you don’t get enough vitamin C!
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	And you lack fighting spirit.
Fujimoto:	Ehhh~?! It’s not like that…
Sho-ji:	Cold virus, huh? Was it a tough cold?
Fujimoto:	Yeah… The fever wouldn’t go down, even after an intravenous drip. I had about 39° all the time.
Sanma:	I see… A lot of people catch a cold at this time of year, in this season… in fall, huh?
Fujimoto:	Yes. And I also got something like an inflammation of the middle ear. The fever went down, but the doctor said I can’t travel by airplane or bullet train, so I couldn’t take part in the concert.
Sanma:	Haa… Has your body always been weak?
Fujimoto:	No, not at all! This was the first time.
Sanma:	Haaa… I see.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	We still don’t know if you really caught a cold though.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol) It was a cold!!
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Maybe you just wanted a few days off.
Sanma:	Maybe you just wanted to rest a bit.
Tamai:	That’s right.
Fujimoto:	It was a cold, a cold.
Sanma:	You can’t believe it when a star says she was sick.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ah, is that so?
Sanma:	Yeah. You can’t believe them.
Fujimoto:	It was a cold.
Sho-ji:	Didn’t you just get sick of it all?
Sanma:	Yeah, yeah!
Takahashi:	Is that true?
Sanma:	I bet it is.
Sho-ji:	Seriously.
Sanma:	Maybe you got into trouble because of some guy.
Tamai:	Ah, that could be.
Fujimoto:	Well, there really are many weird, wrong rumors about it.
Sanma:	See? There are many rumors. That’s right, Sho-ji and I will spread weird rumors about you now.
Fujimoto:	(lol) Why do you take that side?!
Takahashi:	Ahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s funnier that way.
Fujimoto:	(lol) It doesn’t have to be funny!!
Sanma:	Weird rumors are fun. You stupid or what?
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	Of course it would be right to believe that it was a cold and worry about you, but what’s fun about that?
Fujimoto:	It WAS a cold…
Sanma:	It’s more fun to laugh in your face. HAHA!
Fujimoto:	(lol) We don’t need that! Why?
Sanma:	Like “Come to think of it…”… That would be more fun.
Sho-ji:	Something must have happened.
Sanma:	Yeah, something happened.
Fujimoto:	It was a cold, a cold.
Sanma:	Ehh… No, no.
Fujimoto:	Why not?! (LOL)
Sanma:	Well, there are many fun things she could do at this age.
Tamai:	Yeah, there are…
Fujimoto:	What fun things?
Sho-ji:	How old are you again?
Fujimoto:	I’m 19.
Sho-ji:	Ahh… *sigh*
Sanma:	The most extreme time.
Sho-ji:	The most extreme time…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Most extreme as in what?
Sanma:	19 is the time when you wear yourself out the most with relationships with the other sex.
Fujimoto:	I wouldn’t!
Sho-ji:	Having a fever is a part of love and relationships, you know?
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Tamai:	Ah, that kind of “fever”, huh? Ararara.
Takahashi:	Ahhh~
Fujimoto:	It’s not like that.
Tamai:	That kind of fever doesn’t go down easily.
Fujimoto:	No, it was a fever that could be measured by a thermometer.
Sanma:	Eh?
Fujimoto:	I could measure it with a thermometer.
Sanma:	Nah, I bet something happened.
Fujimoto:	(lol) Nothing happened!
Sanma:	Many different rumors come up when you go missing for a week, right?
Fujimoto:	That’s right… Yes.
Sanma:	That’s how it is. If it was 3 months, lots of rumors would get spread.
Fujimoto:	Right.
Sho-ji:	By the way, who came to visit you when you were sick?
Fujimoto:	Eh… The members didn’t come.
Sho-ji:	They didn’t?
Fujimoto:	No.
Sho-ji:	Are they all coldhearted? Could it be that they don’t like you?
Fujimoto:	…that could be…
Sho-ji:	That’s gotta be it! Normally they’d come visit a sick member!
Takahashi:	It’s not like that! Didn’t I send you a mail?!
Sanma:	Even though it was a bother I visited Sho-ji when he was sick.
Sho-ji:	He did! He came and laughed in my face.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	He came, saw me and my ankle and laughed his ass off.
Sanma:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	And hurt me mentally too.
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Hehehe(lol) Seriously.
Fujimoto:	Ah, but yeah, I received mails.
Sho-ji:	And he asked me out to play golf even though I was still in plaster.

• Sho-ji talks about how he suffered playing golf with his ankle in plaster
• when he injured his ankle, Sanma brought him to the hospital, but all the nurses surrounded Sanma and didn’t pay any attention to Sho-ji at first

Sanma:	Then the doctor said “Then I’ll put pressure on your ankle. Murakami-san, are you ready?”. Sho-ji: “Ouch, ouch, ouch!”. Doctor: “Please tell me if something hurts.” Sho-ji: “The hospitalization fee hurts…” (08′17”)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	That’s what hurt him the most.
Sho-ji:	Then Sanma-san said “Are you stupid or what? I’ll pay the hospitalization fee for you! But Doc, look at his foot! It’s turned completely white!”. Doctor: “That’s his sock. His sock.”
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	The doctor pointed to my sock.
Takahashi:	(ROFL) Funny…
Sho-ji:	I only thought “Why doesn’t he go home already…”
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Seriously… He came even closer than the doctor and looked at my foot. He was only in the way for the doctor!
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol) That’s hilarious…
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	That’s what happened…
Fujimoto:	“That’s his sock. His sock.” (lol)
Sanma:	Well, even if someone comes to visit you when you’re sick, that’s how it usually turns out.
Fujimoto:	That’s right.
Sho-ji:	It doesn’t make you happy.
Fujimoto:	Then you think “It’d have been better if he hadn’t come.”
Sho-ji:	Right, right.
Fujimoto:	But I received mails!
Sanma:	From Aichan?
Fujimoto:	From all members.
Sanma:	Oh, what did the mails say?
Fujimoto:	Things like “Are you ok?”.
Sanma:	Ahh…
Takahashi:	She didn’t reply.
Sanma:	Why the… Why didn’t you reply?
Fujimoto:	(lol) Well, I sent many mails to the members saying “I’m sorry” and I also sent my apologies to the members of Country Musume we had concert with. But I didn’t reply Aichan’s mail… (lol)
Sanma:	You didn’t get to reply Aichan’s mail?
Fujimoto:	I think I haven’t replied to any of the mails I received. (lol)
Sho-ji:	Were you in a 6-person room in the hospital?
Fujimoto:	No, in a single room.
Sanma:	Isn’t that to be expected?
Sho-ji:	(lol) Not a 6-person room? A single room?!
Tamai:	A star in a 6-person room? (lol)
Sanma:	She’s famous, you know?
Fujimoto:	I was in a private room.
Sho-ji:	Seriously?
Sanma:	Of course. You’re the only one who gets a 6-person room.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	But when Jimmy came to visit me in the hospital and I came back from the toilet, I found him sleeping in my bed.
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	When I came back from the toilet, he was lying there snoring.
Fujimoto:	Heee~
Sho-ji:	Jimmy sleeping in my bed.
Fujimoto:	And what did you do?
Sho-ji:	I didn’t want to wake him up, so I kept reading a book next to the bed all the time.
Takahashi:	Ehhhh! You didn’t wake him up?!
Fujimoto:	So kind! So kind!
Sanma:	(lol) Our group is so… messed up.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s sad that we don’t act like that on purpose. We’re just like that.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	(continues to read the mail) “I’m glad that she’s healthy and back again. Last month she didn’t take part in the only Yantan she was supposed to appear in either.”
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	“I think that was a mistake. What I mean is Nacchi who once appeared in Yando with a slight cold felt a lot better in the ending and said “I feel like I’ve completely recovered.”. That’s right. The talk in Yantan is a medicine that works better than any medicine in the world. And Sanma-san liked her voice which was hoarse due to the cold and it gave her an advantage in the Iyashitai corner.”
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	“If you should become sick in the future, please try to endure it and appear in Yando.” it says.
Sho-ji:	Ahh…
Sanma:	If you take part in an energetic show like this, something like a cold gets cured.
Fujimoto:	You’re right.
Sanma:	Yeah, yeah. That’s how it is. I’d say it’s because you lack fighting spirit.
Fujimoto:	No, no, I’m totally fired up. (lol)
Sanma:	Then it’s because you lack fighting spirit in your private life. You might be doing your best at work, but you’re not fired up in other matters, are you?
Fujimoto:	I am!
Sanma:	No, you’re not! That’s why you caught a cold. And for a whole week too!
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	It’s unusual to catch a cold during a concert tour! I’d understand it if you caught one after the tour.
Fujimoto:	Well… I was surprised myself.
Sanma:	See? Something must have happened.
Fujimoto:	(lol) What happened?
Sho-ji:	If it was during a concert tour, you should have said that you want to go on stage despite the cold.
Sanma:	Right, right, despite the cold.
Fujimoto:	Ah, I took part in a concert.
Sho-ji:	Eh?
Sanma:	You did?
Fujimoto:	I took part in one, but my fever only worsened on the next day and I was sent back.
Sanma:	Haaa… And you even got hospitalized, right?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Was it tough for you? You want someone beside you at such times, right?
Fujimoto:	That’s right. My mom came to visit me.
Sanma:	Your mother came to you? Because of your cold?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Poor mother.
Fujimoto:	Hehehe(lol)
Sanma:	Don’t call for your mother because of a little cold!
Fujimoto:	But maybe she wanted to come.
Sanma:	No way she wanted to come!
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	Such a spoiled child. No one comes to visit me when I catch a cold.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Fujimoto:	I’m sure lots of people would come to visit you.
Sanma:	Eh?
Fujimoto:	Lots of people.
Sanma:	Even if they would, I never get sick anyway.
Tamai:	That’s right.
Fujimoto:	Heee~ That’s amazing.
Sanma:	I never got to feel the kindness of others.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Tamai:	No one’s ever visited you in the hospital, right?
Sanma:	Right. I’ve never even once been asked “Are you ok?”.
Takahashi:	Hmmm~
Sanma:	Not even once in my life.
Sho-ji:	Though Sanma-san never admits when he’s sick. Even when his nose is running.
Sanma:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Sho-ji: “Did you catch a cold?” Sanma: “No, you idiot!!” Sho-ji: “But your nose…” Sanma: “This is not a cold!!”
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	He’d never admit it. (lol)
Fujimoto:	Hmm… So he might have had a cold at that time.
Sho-ji:	No, no. He never catches a cold.
Sanma:	Well, sometimes it seems like I caught a cold, but I’m fine again after half a day.
Fujimoto:	Ehhh…
Sanma:	You never see me sick in this show, do you?
Fujimoto:	You’re right.
Sanma:	When I catch a cold, it’s already cured the next day. I’ve never had a cold for two days.
Fuji/Taka:	Ehhh~
Sho-ji:	And if I’m not mistaken, you never take medicine either.
Sanma:	I don’t, I don’t.
Sho-ji:	Since you never take medicine, one swallow of it should be enough to cure you, huh?
Sanma:	Yes, directly. In the worst case, I drink a bit of jikinin. Jikinin for infants.
Takahashi:	Ahhh! I drink that too!
Sanma:	One bottle of it.
Takahashi:	Yeah!

• Sanma always buys one bottle of jikinin every year because he’s scared of catching a cold, but he has to throw it away in the end because he didn’t catch a cold after all
• even though it’s “jikinin for infants”, adults can drink it too (adults: 1 bottle, children: 1/3 of a bottle)

second mail: Takahashi served as a pinch hitter in Fujimoto’s radio show (32′59”)

from “Hairi to Kyotaka” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. When Mikitty took a break because of bad physical condition, Takahashi Ai-chan served as a pinch hitter in Mikitty’s radio show the other day. Presenting a radio show on her own for the first time, Aichan started off very enthusiastically, but she was surprisingly good at talking and she seemed completely different compared to Aichan in YanDo who doesn’t say anything else but “Yes.” or “I’m sorry.”. Could this change be thanks to Sanma-san’s strict coaching in Yantan? Aichan, please demonstrate your skills today.

• Takahashi Ai served as a pinch-hitter in Mikitty’s “DokiMiki Night” on September 20th, 2004

Sanma:	Ehh… This is from “Hairi to Kyotaka”. “Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening!
Sanma:	“When Mikitty took a break because of bad physical condition, Takahashi Ai-chan served as a pinch hitter in Mikitty’s radio show the other day.”
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	“Presenting a radio show on her own for the first time, Aichan started off very enthusiastically, but she was surprisingly good at talking…”
Takahashi:	Uhh!
Fujimoto:	Uooh!
Sanma:	“…and she seemed completely different compared to Aichan in YanDo who doesn’t say anything else but “Yes.” or “I’m sorry.”.”
Takahashi:	Ara…
Sanma:	“Could that change be thanks to Sanma-san’s strict coaching in Yantan? Aichan, please demonstrate your skills today.”
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	Looks like you were quite a good pinch hitter for Mikitty.
Sho-ji:	So she plays a different character here, huh?
Sanma:	She’s probably a very calculating woman.
Takahashi:	NO WAY!!!
Tamai:	Uwaa!
Sho-ji:	Excellent!
Takahashi:	Do I really calculate everything?!
Sanma:	I bet you do. Normally you can speak on and on like a waterfall, but here…
Takahashi:	Ehhhh…
Sanma:	Well, the mail says that it was good.
Takahashi:	Ah! Right, right, right!
Sanma:	What is it?
Takahashi:	I brought the coffee.
Sho-ji:	Wha-…
Fujimoto:	(lol) She changed the topic.
	(Takahashi hands over a can of Kona coffee to Sanma)
Sanma:	Ohh, this is it, this is it!
Takahashi:	Is this vanilla flavor?
Sanma:	Kona coffee with vanilla flavor!
	(Takahashi hands over a can of Kona coffee to Sho-ji)
Sho-ji:	What’s with this? Eh? What’s with this?
Takahashi:	It’s from Hawaii.
Sanma:	Sho-ji, you don’t like this coffee, do you?
Sho-ji:	No, I like it.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol) Why did you just try to take away Sho-ji-san’s?
Tamai:	It says “100% Kona”.
Sho-ji:	Uwaa! What’s with this?
Sanma:	(lol) Give me! Give me! Give me!
Fujimoto:	So there’s Kona coffee with vanilla flavor…
Takahashi:	Is this vanilla flavor?
Sanma:	Well, vanilla flavor is the best. There are many Kona coffee flavors…
Fujimoto:	Eh, even something like vanilla flavor?
Sho-ji:	How do you drink this? Can you just put it into a cup like this?
Sanma:	(lol) No, you can’t.
Sho-ji:	Eh? How do you drink this?
Sanma:	You gotta put it on.
Sho-ji:	Where do I put it on?
Sanma:	(lol) Put it on the oden… Are you stupid?!
Sho-ji:	Hehehe(lol) No, I’m serious. How do I drink this?
Sanma:	I meant “put on the coffee”. (lol)
Takahashi:	Is this the right flavor?
Sho-ji:	What? How?
Sanma:	Look, don’t you have a coffee maker at home?
Sho-ji:	No…
Sanma:	(to Takahashi) Yes, this is the right one.
Takahashi:	This is the right one?
Sho-ji:	I got a juice mixer though.
Sanma:	No… (lol)
Takahashi:	Haha(lol) Mixer?!
Fujimoto:	You’re not supposed to mix it! (lol)
Sho-ji:	Can’t you put it into a mixer?
Takahashi:	You can’t!
Sanma:	Sho-ji, don’t you have those cup coffee makers?
Sho-ji:	No, I don’t.
Sanma:	The ones where you put the coffee grounds on top?
Sho-ji:	No, I don’t have one.
Sanma:	Then do you have that one where you only have to pour hot water into it… and it has this thing on top…
Sho-ji:	Cup ramen?
Sanma:	“Cup ramen” (lol)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Then what do you mean? You only pour hot water into it?
Sanma:	Umm… You only drink instant ones, right? Instant coffee?
Sho-ji:	Yes, that’s right. You just pour the coffee into the cup and…
Fujimoto:	…and stir it.
Sanma:	Ah, do you have a tea strainer?
Sho-ji:	I don’t have one.
Sanma:	Ah, then it’s no good.
Sho-ji:	Can I borrow yours?
Sanma:	Haha(lol)
Fujimoto:	(lol) Right, right.
Sanma:	(lol) Why the hell… At least buy a tea strainer yourself!
Takahashi:	“Can I borrow yours?” (lol)
Fujimoto:	“Can I borrow yours?”.. Cute! That was cute!
Takahashi:	“Can I borrow yours?” (lol)
Sanma:	Then you should…
Sho-ji:	Ah, then it’s okay. You take it.
Takahashi:	Eh? So you don’t need it?
Sho-ji:	No, I’ll give it to Sanma-san…
Takahashi:	Then uhh…
Sho-ji:	I’ll make it a present to Sanma-san. Sanma-san always drinks this kind of coffee.
Takahashi:	Oh, I see.
Sanma:	The only coffee I can drink is Kona coffee with vanilla flavor.
Takahashi:	Then you won’t drink this one, huh?
Sanma:	No, I’ll drink this one.
Takahashi:	Ah, really?
Sanma:	I drink this five times a day.
Takahashi:	But that’s not vanilla flavor.
Sanma:	…this is not vanilla flavor?
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Eh? Why?
Takahashi:	Eh? Is this vanilla flavor?
Sanma:	Eh… It isn’t?
Sho-ji:	What is it then?
Takahashi:	Eh, I don’t know. (lol)
Sanma:	Isn’t it written on it?
Takahashi:	I have no idea!
Sho-ji:	“Kona”… It says “Kona”.
Sanma:	Ah, then… Can I open it?
Takahashi:	Of course.
Sho-ji:	So it isn’t vanilla flavor?
Sanma:	I’ll know when I take a smell at it.
Takahashi:	And what if it isn’t vanilla flavor?
Sho-ji:	Eh, Takahashi, where did you go to? Did you go to Hawaii?
Takahashi:	I was… in Hawaii and…
Fujimoto:	Because of work.
Sho-ji:	Eh, alone?
Fujimoto:	No, Morning Musume went to a fanclub event there.
Sho-ji:	Ah, you did?
Takahashi:	Yes. And at that time… I bought Kona coffee.
Sho-ji:	Yeah… How admirable!
Sanma:	I’ll open it, ok?
Sho-ji:	Is it a different flavor?
Sanma:	It’s different. This is a different one.
Takahashi:	Ara!
Sho-ji:	Eh?
Sanma:	I don’t need it, I don’t need it.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	EHH?! YOU DON’T NEED IT~~?!
Sanma:	(lol) I don’t need it.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s not the flavor I like.
Tamai:	It doesn’t say anything about “vanilla flavor”.
Sanma:	This one has a bitter flavor. This is a bitter one.
Takahashi:	Eh, but… Eh…
Sanma:	You could give it to someone.
Sho-ji:	No… (lol) You already opened it! (lol)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	You’re saying she should give it to someone, but you already opened it.
Fujimoto:	Yeah, really!
Sho-ji:	It’s the same as when you already had half of it! Seriously.
Takahashi:	What do I do with this now?
Sanma:	You drink it.
Takahashi:	Ueah?
Sho-ji:	Do you like coffee, Takahashi?
Takahashi:	I don’t drink coffee!
Sanma:	Then just put it somewhere as decoration.
Takahashi:	Ehh?!
Sanma:	Don’t you smoke?
Takahashi:	I don’t!
Sanma:	Ah, I see… You know what? You could put it all into an ashtray and then…
Takahashi:	That’d be a waste!!
Sanma:	But you won’t drink it anyway!
Takahashi:	Ahh, that’s right… But I bought it to make it a present to you!
Sanma:	Yeah… Well, I’m thankful for that… I know! You could put it near an open fire. Then when it burns, the smell of coffee fills the air.
Sho-ji:	Oh, that’s nice!
Sanma:	Yeah!
Sho-ji:	Then it’s like an incense.
Sanma:	Right, right. I always do that with the coffee I don’t drink and… I’ll do it with this too.
Takahashi:	Ok.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s a pain in the ass for you to take it back with you, right? You won’t drink it anyway.
Takahashi:	Here you go.
Sanma:	Yeah…
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Yeah… This one has bitter flavor. But this isn’t bad coffee. There are lots of people who like this sort.
Fujimoto:	You like coffee that’s not bitter?
Sanma:	I like vanilla flavor, the really sweet one.
Sho-ji:	I think I’ll try drinking it once too.
Sanma:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Please do so.
Fujimoto:	With a tea strainer…
Takahashi:	You have to use a tea strainer…
Sho-ji:	Can I buy one? (he said it like “Can I borrow yours?”)
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	Please buy one.
Sho-ji:	Can I?
Fujimoto:	Please buy a tea strainer.
Sho-ji:	And a tea strainer would be enough?
Takahashi:	Does it work with a tea strainer?
Sanma:	You’d have to do it a couple of times with a tea strainer.
Tamai:	You’ll need filters. The paper ones.
Fujimoto:	It’d be best if you buy filters.
Sho-ji:	Oh, there’s something like that too?
Tamai:	Yes.
Fujimoto:	There is, there is.
Sanma:	It’d be best if you buy filters, but… you could make coffee the fastest with a coffee maker.
Fujimoto:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Yeah, there are cheap coffee makers too.
Tamai:	Yes, a few thousand yen only.
Sanma:	But judging from the way Sho-ji thinks, it’d be best if you just buy those instant paper coffee filters you can use instead of a tea strainer.
Sho-ji:	I understand. Then I’ll buy those.
Sanma:	Sho-ji, this is not the coffee you like. This one is bitter coffee, you know?
Sho-ji:	But I’ve been drinking only black coffee lately.
Sanma:	Ah! Then you’ll like this one!
Tamai:	Yeah.
Sho-ji:	Really? I’ll like it, huh?
Sanma:	Yeah, this is pretty bitter too. You’ll know when you drink it. It’s cultivated in a soil which consists of volcanic ash… solidified lava.
Fujimoto:	Is that so?
Sho-ji:	That doesn’t tell me much since I don’t know how lava tastes…
Takahashi:	I don’t know either.
Sho-ji:	Does it smell like lava?
Sanma:	Well… lava-like. Lava-like. A special flavor.
Tamai:	(lol) “Lava-like” (lol)
Sho-ji:	If it tastes like lava, then I don’t need this.
Takahashi:	You don’t need it?!
Sanma:	Murakami-san, it’s hot. It’s hot.
Sho-ji:	(lol) Thank you for this.
Takahashi:	You’re welcome, you’re welcome.
Sanma:	Yeah… Coffee cultivated in volcanic regions like Kona coffee are famous.
Sho-ji:	There are lots of different Kona flavors, huh? Even vanilla flavor.
Sanma:	That’s right.
Fujimoto:	There’s a Kona coffee tree in Hawaii that belongs to me.
Takahashi:	Really?!
Sanma:	You mean it belongs to the chairman?
Fujimoto:	No, to me. I planted it myself.
Sho-ji:	Eh?
Sanma:	It belongs to the chairman, doesn’t it?
Fujimoto:	No, I planted it under my name “Fujimoto Miki”.
Sanma:	But the chairman did it for you, right?
Sho-ji:	You bought the land too?
Sanma:	Yeah, yeah, the chairman bought land there.
Fujimoto:	Ahh… Not there. It was when I went to Hawaii for a photobook dvd shoot before I joined Morning Musume. I planted a tree under my name “Fujimoto Miki” and they said they would send me the Kona coffee in about 2 years.
Sanma:	Ah, is that so?
Fujimoto:	I think you can plant your own private tree there.
Sanma:	Ah, so there’s a place like that in Hawaii…
Takahashi:	I see…
Sanma:	Last year I went to a Doutor coffee shop in Hawaii.
Fujimoto:	Ah, yes, yes.
Sanma:	Even though it said doutor coffee, they served coffee handmade by an old woman. And wow, it was delicious. It had a flavor only that old woman could make. Though I don’t know how she did it.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Umm… Fujimoto, when you get the coffee from your tree in Hawaii… give me.
Fujimoto:	(lol) But it’s not vanilla flavor though.
Sanma:	…what flavor is it?
Fujimoto:	I think it’s a different flavor…
Sho-ji:	But how do you get coffee with vanilla flavor? Do they add vanilla flavor during the production?
Fujimoto:	I wonder how they do it…
Sanma:	I think it depends on the tree and the type of beans.
Fujimoto:	Probably the type of beans.
Sanma:	The sweetness probably depends on the type of beans.
Fujimoto:	Mmm…
Sanma:	When you drink it as iced coffee at daybreak… it’s the best.
Tamai:	“Iced coffee at daybreak” (lol)
Sanma:	No coffee shop could ever beat that taste. If there was a coffee shop with iced Kona coffee with vanilla flavor, I think it would even beat Starbucks.
Fujimoto:	Ahh…
Takahashi:	Is it that sweet?
Sanma:	It’s sweet. Moderately sweet.
Fujimoto:	Eh? Don’t you add sugar or anything?
Sanma:	I do. When I got bitter coffee like this, I additionally buy caramel syrup. Then I make iced coffee out of it, add caramel syrup, milk and it tastes like Kona coffee with vanilla flavor.
Fujimoto:	Heee… amazing… I didn’t know that.
Takahashi:	Me neither.
Sanma:	Yeah. And Takahashi went through the trouble of buying Kona coffee for me.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Did you buy it because you knew that Akashiya Sanma likes Kona coffee?
Takahashi:	No, I didn’t.
Sanma:	So it’s a coincidence?
Takahashi:	No, I had bought Kona coffee in Hawaii, but hadn’t given it to anyone yet. And when I heard that you like Kona coffee, I brought it with me.
Sanma:	Ah, so you bought it a long time ago?
Takahashi:	No, I bought it in August.
Sho-ji:	In August… (lol)
Sanma:	(lol) In August, huh?
Takahashi:	(lol)
Sanma:	Ah, last time you were like “Ahh!” when I talked about Kona coffee.
Takahashi:	I did.
Sanma:	(lol) Right, right, right…
Takahashi:	You said there was 10% Kona coffee too, right?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	But I brought the 100% one for you.
Sanma:	Hehehe(lol)
Sho-ji:	Ohhh… How admirable.
Sanma:	100% Kona coffee… I’ll try drinking it. I wonder how it tastes.
Takahashi:	I’m glad.
Sanma:	You bought this at the airport, right?
Takahashi:	No, not there!!
Sanma:	Eh?
Takahashi:	I bought it in a real… supermarket-like place.
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	You went there?
Takahashi:	We did!
Fujimoto:	We went there in our free time.
Sho-ji:	Heee… How admirable.
Takahashi:	It was a really huge building.
Sanma:	So it’s not like you bought it in a coffee shop, huh?
Takahashi:	Not in a coffee shop, but… in something like a… coffee… corner.
Everyone:	Haha(lol)

third mail: Sanma used Fujimoto’s imitation of Setsuko in Athens (42′58”)

from “Red Eye” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. It’s been a while since the Olympic Games in Athens ended, but I think the most striking moment for YanDo listeners was when Shibata Ai won gold medal. That’s because Sanma-san was wearing racing swimwear when he invited Shibata-san into the studio. Furthermore he kept shouting a phrase that included “pichipichi ya nen“, Mikitty’s impersonation of Setsuko. Sanma-san doing Mikitty’s impersonation… Does that mean that Sanma-san thought of Mikitty when he was in Athens?

 

Sanma:	This is from “Red Eye”. “Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”.
Everyone:	Good evening!
Sanma:	“It’s been a while since the Olympic Games in Athens ended, but I think the most striking moment for YanDo listeners was when Shibata Ai won gold medal. That’s because Sanma-san was wearing racing swimwear when he invited Shibata-san into the studio. Furthermore he kept shouting a phrase that included ‘pichipichi ya nen’, Mikitty’s impersonation of Setsuko.”
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	“Sanma-san doing Mikitty’s impersonation… Does that mean that Sanma-san thought of Mikitty when he was in Athens?”.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	You know… I put on a real women’s racing swimwear. And it really… felt so awkward that I said “pichipichi ya nen~”. And I did remember Fujimoto when I said that.
Fujimoto:	(lol) Ah, really?! Yaaaay! (applause)
Sanma:	“Pichipichi ya nen~!”
Sho-ji:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	And they liked it! “Pichipichi ya nen~” “Setsuko pichipichi ya nen~“
Fujimoto:	“Onaka pichipichi ya nen~“
Sanma:	But that time, I said “Kokan pichipichi ya nen~“!
Fujimoto:	(lol) I don’t like that~~~!!
Takahashi:	Iyaa….. >_>
Sanma:	Let’s change it to “my crotch”! Change it!
Fujimoto:	I won’t change it! (lol)
Tamai:	“Change it” (lol)
Sho-ji:	She won’t change it!
Sanma:	(lol) Can’t you change it?
Sho-ji:	She won’t change it!
Fujimoto:	(lol) Why did you change the line?
Sanma:	Like I said, my crotch felt weird at that time, so I said “Kokan pichipichi ya nen~!” and it seems like Shiba-san found it funny. “Pichipichi ya nen~”
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Well, it’s a joke where you don’t know if the guests will laugh.
Fujimoto:	Ahh… That’s right, huh?
	…
Sanma:	“Pichipichi ya nen~”… How did it go again?
Fujimoto:	“Niichan, onaka pichipichi ya nen~!“
Sanma:	(lol) That’s it.
Takahashi:	So good!
Sanma:	Her “pichipichi ya nen” is good.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	And you’re good at impersonating Mikawa Ken’ichi, aren’t you?
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	Mikawa Ken’ichi.
Takahashi:	(imitates Mikawa Ken’ichi)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	You’re good!
Fujimoto:	I love it.
Sho-ji:	Takahashi, you’re good!
Takahashi:	It’s not a voice imitation though…
Sanma:	It’s kinda sad because this is a radio show.
Takahashi:	That’s right…
Sho-ji:	That looked like him!
Takahashi:	It’s not an imitation of his voice…
Sanma:	Now I feel like stealing Shimizu Michiko’s impersonation of Kikukawa Rei. “I’m Kikukawa Rei…”.. It doesn’t sound like her, huh?
Fujimoto:	Ehh, I don’t know…
Takahashi:	I don’t know…
Sanma:	“I’m Kikukawa Rei…”
Fujimoto:	It probably doesn’t sound like her. (lol)
Sanma:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”. This doesn’t sound like her either, huh?
Takahashi:	Ahaha(lol)!
Sho-ji:	Who’s that supposed to be?
Sanma:	(lol) Didn’t I just say “I’m Yamaguchi Moe”?
Sho-ji:	I don’t recognize it. Even if you say that, I don’t recognize it.
Sanma:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”
Sho-ji:	Who’s that supposed to be?
Sanma:	DIDN’T I JUST SAY I’M YAMAGUCHI MOE?!
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Ahaha(lol) Well, well…
Sanma:	If you pinch your nose like this, you’ll sound like her.
Fujimoto:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”
Takahashi:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe..”
Sanma:	Say it even slower.
Fuji/Taka:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”
Sanma:	Ahh, you two suck at it too.
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Takahashi, who else can you impersonate?
Takahashi:	Me?
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Ahhhh! Onitsuka-san!
Sanma:	Onitsuka-san? Onitsuka Chichiro-san?
Fujimoto:	“Chichiro” (rofl)
Takahashi:	It’s Chihiro-san!
Fujimoto:	(lol) It’s Chihiro-san.
Sanma:	Onitsuka Chihiro-san…
Fujimoto:	Yes. (lol)
Takahashi:	Ah! Doi Takako-san too!
Sho-ji:	Ah, right!
Sanma:	Right, right!
Sho-ji:	You’re good at that one, right?
Takahashi:	“Doi Takako de gozaimasu!“
Sho-ji:	Amazing! That sounded like her!
Sanma:	And what about Onitsuka?
Takahashi:	♪I am God’s…♪ Doesn’t sound like her.
Sanma:	Does it sound like her or not?
Fujimoto:	It does!
Takahashi:	It sounds like her if I do it seriously.
Sanma:	Ahh…. Then do it seriously!
Takahashi:	I think it sounds like her.
Sanma:	Show me.
Takahashi:	Wait a moment please…
Sanma:	Yes.
Takahashi:	♪I am…♪ A moment please.
Sanma:	Was that good?
Takahashi:	Which one of her songs should I sing?
Fujimoto:	I think that song is best.
Sanma:	“I’m Yamaguchi…”
Fujimoto:	“…Moe.”
Sho-ji:	Who’s that?
Takahashi:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”
Sanma:	You have to say it even slower. Enough of that. Hurry and do the Onitsuka one now.
Takahashi:	“I’m Yamaguchi…”
Sanma:	Not that one!!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Not Yama… (lol) Yamaguchi. Do the Onitsuka one.
Takahashi:	♪I am God’s… child… Kono fuhai shita sekai ni otosareta~~♪
Sanma:	How’s it? How’s it? Does it sound like her, Mikitty?
Fujimoto:	Yes, she sings like that.
Takahashi:	She sings like this.
Sanma:	But Takahashi, you’re really good at singing!
Sho-ji:	She’s good!
Fujimoto:	She is.
Sanma:	When you sing in a different way than in Morning Musume songs, you sound better.
Takahashi:	Is that so?
Sho-ji:	I bet you’re good at singing ballads!
Sanma:	Right, right! That just now was…
Tamai:	How did the “Kaere Sorento” one go?
Takahashi:	♪Vide ‘o mare quant’è bello!♪
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	♪Spira…♪
Sho-ji:	You’re really good at singing!
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	When you sing in a way like that Onitsuka one, then you sound better than normally!
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	Yeah…
Takahashi:	Thanks.
Sanma:	I bet you’re good at singing Kiroro’s songs.
Takahashi:	Kiroro?
Sanma:	Kiroro’s songs. ♪Nagai aida♪ for example.
Takahashi:	♪Matasete gomen♪
Sanma:	Ohh, that one.
Sho-ji:	Ohh, that’s a nice voice.
Takahashi:	We used to sing this in chorus club.
Sanma:	“Nagai aida”?
Takahashi:	Yes. “Best friend” too. The one that goes like this. ♪Mou daijoubu shinpai nai to♪
Sanma:	Ahhh…
Sho-ji:	Good!
Sanma:	But the way you sang that Onitsuka song was best.
Takahashi:	♪I am God’s…♪
Sanma:	It’s good if you sing like that.
Takahashi:	Ah! I got another one!
Sanma:	….that’s enough already.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Takahashi:	One more!
Sanma:	That’s enough already.
Takahashi:	Umm… umm… umm… What was her name? What was her name….?
Sho-ji:	Eh?
Sanma:	Who?
Sho-ji:	Doi Takako?
Takahashi:	Not her!
Sanma:	“Doi Takako de gozaimasu!”
Takahashi:	Not her! Not her!
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Eh? Mikawa-san? Mikawa-san?
Takahashi:	No, no, no!
Sanma:	♪Iie watashi♪
Takahashi:	No! Not him!!
Tamai:	Kikukawa-san?
Takahashi:	No!
Sanma:	“I’m Kikkawa…”
Takahashi:	Not her!
Fujimoto:	Yamaguchi Moe-san?
Takahashi:	No…
Sanma:	“I’m Yamaguchi Moe…”
Fujimoto:	Ahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	♪Itsumo no you ni maku ga~♪
Sanma:	Ahh! Chiaki Naomi-san!
Takahashi:	Right, right.
Sho-ji:	That sounded like her, it really did.
Takahashi:	I like her songs.
Sanma:	Ah, I see.

fourth mail: Fujimoto’s portrait of Sanma (48′34”)

from “Potechin” Everyone at YanDo, good evening. I heard that Shiba-chan and Murata-san once tried drawing portraits of Sanma-san and Sho-ji-san during a Melon Kinenbi live concert, but now Mikitty had to draw a portrait of Sanma-san in her own radio show as a punishment. Sanma-san, please have a look at it and let us know about your impressions of the portrait.

• Fujimoto drew this portrait in the Dokimiki Night episode on August 16th, 2004

Sanma:	This one’s from “Potechin” in Osaka.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Everyone at YanDo, good evening.”
Everyone:	Good evening!
Sanma:	“I heard that Shiba-chan and Murata-san once tried drawing portraits of Sanma-san and Sho-ji-san during a Melon Kinenbi live concert, but now Mikitty had to draw a portrait of Sanma-san in her own radio show as a punishment.”
Fujimoto:	(rofl)
Sanma:	“Sanma-san, please have a look at it and let us know about your impressions of the portrait.” it says.
Sho-ji:	Eh?
Sanma:	How did the listeners obtain the portrait?
Fujimoto:	Umm… In the radio show I present on my own… I have to draw a portrait of someone as a punishment if I can’t recite a tongue twister correctly. And I’m really bad at drawing.
Sanma:	Yes, yes.
Fujimoto:	And I drew Sanma-san… (lol)
Sanma:	It’s ok that you drew me, but how did the listeners get hold of it?
Takahashi:	Ah, they used a computer.
Sanma:	Ahh… you make it open to the public?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	(sees the portrait)
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	Who’s this..?
Sanma:	It says “Sanma-san”.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sho-ji:	This is beyond recognition.
Sanma:	Doesn’t it look like Sho-ji?
Sho-ji:	Haha(lol)
Fujimoto:	First of all, I drew buck teeth. (lol)
Sanma:	I’m saying “Ohh, imitate Lum-chan please.”. And… “Ahh.. Ahh… Ha…ha…”.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	This shows how I always laugh, huh? Isn’t this Sho-ji?
Fujimoto:	Noo, it’s Sanma-san!
Sanma:	Doesn’t look like me.
Sho-ji:	Doesn’t look like him.
Takahashi:	It doesn’t look like him.
Fujimoto:	I know it doesn’t look like him. (lol)
Sho-ji:	You’re no good at drawing?
Fujimoto:	I’m no good at it.
Takahashi:	You really are no good at it.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol) Yes, I am…
Sanma:	One can see that you don’t have no talent for drawing.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	No talent. The ears are totally different in size too.
Fujimoto:	Ahahaha(lol)
Sanma:	It looks like the “Who cares anyway?” face Chibi Maruko-chan makes.
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	Ahhhh! You’re right!!
Sanma:	It looks like one of Chibi Maruko-chan’s classmates who is silently standing in the background making a “Who cares anyway?” face.
Fujimoto:	(lol) That’s not true…
Takahashi:	It looks like that!
Sanma:	It does, doesn’t it?
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	It doesn’t look like me at all.
Tamai:	Yeah.
Fujimoto:	But it’s Sanma-san.
Sanma:	No, no. This… means that you don’t like me. When girls draw someone they like, they usually make the person look more handsome.
Fujimoto:	But I added hearts on both sides of your name.
Sanma:	But then you’d make me look more handsome!
Fujimoto:	No, no, I tried to make you look handsome and that’s the result! (lol)
Sanma:	You couldn’t capture any of my features…
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	You seriously suck at it.
Fujimoto:	But…
Takahashi:	(lol) He said you suck at it.
Fujimoto:	I can’t draw…
Sanma:	Can’t be helped coz you suck at it. So that’s what you do as a punishment in your show.
Fujimoto:	That’s right.
Sanma:	And you make it open to the public in the internet, huh?
Tamai:	Right. It’s made public in the internet.
Sanma:	Ah… Eh, you can get it if it’s in the internet?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Haa…
Tamai:	And you can print it on paper.
Sanma:	So you can draw portraits of others and put it into the internet?
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	That’s amazing… Looks like I have to get connected to the internet soon…
Tamai:	That’s right.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Tamai:	You should.
Sanma:	Internet, huh… What other benefits does the internet offer?
Fujimoto:	Let’s see… You can find information about all kinds of things.
Tamai:	Right. And you can send and receive mails.
Sanma:	I know that. Of course I know that much!
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Music too!
Fujimoto:	You can download music.
Sanma:	But that’s illegal, isn’t it? Actually.
Tamai:	No, no, it isn’t. It’s legal.
Takahashi:	You can copy the music you’re allowed to copy.
Sanma:	Eh, what was that?
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Takahashi:	What? Ah, you mean “copy”?
Sanma:	(flees from the topic) ♪Degua monte sero♪
Takahashi:	♪Vide ‘o mare…♪
Everyone:	(lol)
Tamai:	It starts with “vi”.
Sanma:	Ah, “vi”.
Tamai:	“Vide” (lol)
Sanma:	♪Veoh mante…♪
Takahashi:	♪Vide ‘o mare quant’è bello!♪
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	The end.

The “boke lectureship returns” corner (52′04”)

	(intro: “Joshi Kashimashi Monogatari”)
Tamai:	The YanDo boke corner returns!!
Fujimoto:	Yaay!
Takahashi:	Yay!
Sanma:	We’re bringing it back again?
Takahashi:	Yaay!
Tamai:	(lol) Umm… We heard that Takahashi Ai-chan doesn’t act like a boke in quiz corners of tv shows.
Takahashi:	It’s because I’m not a boke!
Fujimoto:	No, you’re one. (lol)
Takahashi:	Eh?
Tamai:	Since she’s denying it, we thought we should teach her how to act like a boke in Youngtown one more time.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ah, I understand. So in short, Takahashi doesn’t act like a boke even though she is one and everyone expects her to act like one.
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	Mmm…
Tamai:	That’s why we thought Sanma-san and Sho-ji-san could teach her again.
Sanma:	Ah, I see, of course, of course.
Tamai:	Then Fujimoto and Takahashi will both have a boke lectureship today.
Fujimoto:	Yes, please.
Takahashi:	Yes, please.
Sho-ji:	Yes.
Tamai:	(lol) Then I’ll tell you the theme, Fujimoto and Takahashi will act like boke’s and master and Sho-ji-san will judge which one of the two was a better boke.
Takahashi:	Mmm.. >_<
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Tamai:	Then are you two ready?
Fuji/Taka:	Yes.

phrase: “Quietly peep into the school of killifish. All the killifish are XXXing.”

from “Ootomo-san and Sasaki-san” (53′09”) Dialog between Sanma-san and Musume: Sanma: “Quietly peep into it. Quietly peep into it.” Musume: “All the killifish are XXXing.”

 

Tamai:	There’s a children’s song called “Medaka no gakkou“. Sanma-san will sing “Quietly peep into it, quietly peep into it.” and after that Fujimoto and Takahashi will sing “All the killifish are XXXing”. (01′14”)
Sanma:	Ah, they’ll have to finish the sentence.
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	So you have to change the lyrics. “All the killifish are XXXing.”. Ok, then decide with janken who’s gonna start first.
Fujimoto:	First the stone. Jankenpo! I won!
Sanma:	First or second?
Fujimoto:	I’ll go first.
Sanma:	Eh, you sure you want to go first?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	You just recently recovered from your cold, so don’t push yourself too hard.
Fujimoto:	(lol) Yes… Then I’ll go first.
Sanma:	Then here we go.
Fujimoto:	Ok.
Sanma:	♪Quietly peep into it♪
Fujimoto:	…
Sanma:	Now you should sing “All the killifish are…”, right?
Tamai:	Yes. (lol)
Sanma:	Shall I sing the “All the killifish are…” part too?
Tamai:	No, no, he will sing the first line once and then you’ll directly reply.
Fujimoto:	Ah! Ok. One more time please.
Sanma:	The school of killifish, right?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	♪Quietly peep into it♪
Fujimoto:	♪All the killifish are playing truant♪
Sanma:	Truent?
Fujimoto:	Truant. (lol)
Sanma:	Ah, truancy, huh?
Takahashi:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	But you know….
Sho-ji:	It’s difficult to understand, isn’t it?
Sanma:	♪All the killifish are playing truant♪
Fujimoto:	Playing truant.
Sanma:	It sounded like “playing truent”.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol) No, they’re playing truant.
Sanma:	Ahh… I see.
Fujimoto:	Because it’s a school for killifish, the killifish don’t want to go there.
Sanma:	Well, well, you could say it was socio-satirical if you were to praise it.
Tamai:	That’s right.
Sanma:	You could say it was socio-satirical. Ehhh.. This would probably get you applause from the audience too.
Fujimoto:	Oh!
Tamai:	(lol)
Sanma:	Like I said, Takahashi, you have to act like a boke here. Ready?
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	Are you prepared?
Takahashi:	Please go on.
Sanma:	♪Quietly peep into it♪
Takahashi:	♪All the killifish happily drowned together♪
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	(lol) That was good, that was good!
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	That was good, that was good. It’s because they’re all comrades.
Fujimoto:	That was cute! (lol)
Sanma:	It’s like saying “It’s not scary if we cross the street together on a red light.”.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	That was… They all happily drowned together. One would say “Isn’t that cruel?!”.
Fujimoto:	(lol) That was cute…
Sanma:	That was good.
Takahashi:	Yes, thank you very much.
Sanma:	You have to say things like this in quiz shows!
Takahashi:	Yes.
Fujimoto:	You’re right.
Sanma:	Right, right.
Sho-ji:	Do you always give normal answers (in quiz shows)?
Takahashi:	Yes, I answer normally.
Sho-ji:	That’s no good…
Takahashi:	But I have a responsibility to bear…
Sanma:	What responsibility?
Takahashi:	Collective responsibility.
Fujimoto:	It’s always team games.
Sanma:	Ah… I see, I see. If you lose, there’s always a punishment waiting for you all, huh?
Fujimoto:	That’s right. If we lose, we don’t get any reward for example.
Sanma:	Takahashi can’t show her funny side with such rules holding her back.
Sho-ji:	Yeah. Definitely not.
Fujimoto:	It’s scary, right? Your heart starts beating faster.
Takahashi:	So scary…
Fujimoto:	You end up thinking “What if I make a mistake…”..
Sanma:	Ahh… So it’s that kind of show…
Fujimoto:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Then it can’t be helped…
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Tamai:	Then let’s continue.

phrase: “Please let me take a break from YanDo.”

from “Naniwa no bakushou samurai” (56′09”) Dialog between Sanma-san and Musume: Musume: “Sanma-san, I have something important to do this week, so please let me take a break from YanDo.” Sanma: “What do you have to do?” Musume: “[insert funny reason]”

 

Tamai:	First the two YanMusume will say “Sanma-san, I have something important to do this week, so please let me take a break from Yantan.”. (04′08”)
Fuji/Taka:	Yes.
Tamai:	Then master will ask “What do you have to do?”.
Sanma:	“What do you have to do? What’s the matter?” and then they’ll say something funny.
Tamai:	That’s when they say something funny.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Tamai:	No need to hold back.
Sanma:	“No need to hold back” (lol)
Tamai:	Yes. (lol)
Sanma:	Then let’s start with Miki-chan.
Fujimoto:	Yes!
Sanma:	Ok.
Fujimoto:	Sanma-san, I have something important to do this week, so please let me take a break from YanDo.
Sanma:	Eh? Why?
Fujimoto:	I want to check if the Lawson near my home on the countryside is still there.
Sanma:	Ah, well, well… You mentioned the Lawson gag… Well, I’ll be nice because you’ve only recently recovered from your cold.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol) Yaaay!
Sanma:	I’m only being nice because you’ve only recently recovered. Normally I’d have excoriated you.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol) You’re nice today.
Takahashi:	What do I do, what do I do…
Sanma:	Well, she’s only just recovered. She had a temperature of more than 39° for a few days, so it’s understandable.
Tamai:	You’re right.
Fujimoto:	(lol) But I’m more a tsukkomi anyway.
Sanma:	Miki, you’re a tsukkomi? (lol)
Fujimoto:	More a tsukkomi than a boke.
Sanma:	I see.
Fujimoto:	I’m a tsukkomi in Morning Musume.
Sanma:	Ah, so you’re in charge of tsukkomi there.
Fujimoto:	Something like that.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Now… Mikitty played along with my Lawson joke.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	That’s why you definitely have to say something really good to beat it.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Takahashi, let’s start.
Takahashi:	….
Sanma:	Takahashi?
Takahashi:	Mm?
Sanma:	Eh? Am I Takahashi? I’m not, am I?
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	You.. You’re Takahashi, aren’t you?
Takahashi:	Yes, you’re right!
Sanma:	Don’t mix them up. I’m Sugimoto, I know our names sound alike, but…
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	(stuttering) Sanma-san! I have something important to do, so please let me…
Sanma:	(lol) Ehh…? No, say it properly from the start!
Takahashi:	Yes, I’m sorry. Yes. Sanma-san!
Sanma:	What is it?
Takahashi:	I have something important to do, so please let me take a break from YanDo.
Sanma:	Eh, why’s that?
Takahashi:	(with a heavy dialect) A typhoon’s comin’ an’ I gotta hurry up an’ go!
Sanma:	What did you say? (lol)
Fujimoto:	I have no idea what you just said. (lol)
Tamai:	Haha(lol) What did she say?
Takahashi:	(lol) There’s a typhoon comin’! I gotta hurry up!
Sanma:	(lol) What was that?
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	The planes won’t be able to land!
Sanma:	(lol) Not like that…
Takahashi:	Eh? (getting irritated) A typhoon is coming!
Sanma:	Uaaah!(lol) What the hell… (lol)
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	(lol) But I have to get on the plane, right?
Sanma:	(lol) That may be, but more important than that… You have to act like a boke! This is the boke lectureship! That wasn’t boke, was it?
Takahashi:	…no.
Sanma:	You answered seriously! You have to be a boke!
Takahashi:	Yes.
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	You gotta be a boke! Ok? Got it?
Takahashi:	I understand.
Sanma:	One more time, one more time.
Takahashi:	Sanma-san! I have something important to do, so please let me take a break from YanDo.
Sanma:	Eh? Why?
Takahashi:	I have to cram for a test.
Sanma:	Pfft(lol) Like I said…
Tamai:	Hahahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	Such a normal reason. Cramming for a test is important, isn’t it?
Takahashi:	What should I do~~~?!
Sanma:	That was too normal. You don’t have to take a break from YanDo for that!
Takahashi:	You’re right…
Sanma:	You have to say something unbelievable, something crazy in such a situation. Got it?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ok, one more time.
Takahashi:	Sanma-san, I have something important to do, so please let me take a break from YanDo.
Sanma:	What’s the matter?
Takahashi:	Umm… I have to go buy vanilla coffee.
Sanma:	Something like that is no good!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	That was no good. Now hurry up and say something crazy.
Takahashi:	What do you mean with “something crazy”?
Sanma:	Eh? Something like “I gotta get into the shoerack.”. Something that doesn’t make sense. Something crazy that suits your character, Takahashi.
Takahashi:	Ehh…
Sanma:	It’d be weird if Mikitty said that though.
Takahashi:	Ehhhh~
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	We’re practicing how to be a boke right now, aren’t we?
Takahashi:	But I’m not a boke.
Sho-ji:	No, you gotta act like one.
Sanma:	Act like one.
Takahashi:	You’re right, huh?
Everyone:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Murakami-san, how would you do it?
Tamai:	“Murakami-san” (lol)
Fujimoto:	“Murakami-san” (lol)
Sho-ji:	Me? Me? Umm… Sanma-san, let me take a break from YanDo next week.
Sanma:	Why’s that?
Sho-ji:	Hideyoshi summoned me.
Sanma:	(lol) Yeah, something like that.
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ahh… That was great!
Tamai:	(lol) Was it great..?
Sho-ji:	No way!
Takahashi:	Great!
Sho-ji:	Really?
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Saying something crazy like that is what being a boke is like. Now, Takahashi, try it.
Takahashi:	Yes. Sanma-san, I have something important to do, so please let me take a break from YanDo.
Sanma:	Why’s that?
Takahashi:	I’ll travel to the year 645!
Sanma:	Not good…
Takahashi:	Why not?!
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	This is not the time to be visiting the Taika reforms!
Takahashi:	But I like Prince Naka-no-Ōe!
Sanma:	What are you saying, you… you…
Takahashi:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	It’s hopeless.
Takahashi:	I had enough.
Sanma:	“I had enough” (lol)
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	That’s my line, you idiot!
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	Who are you to say “I had enough”?!
Takahashi:	I’m sorry. (lol)
Sanma:	That’s my line!
Takahashi:	I’m sorry.
Sanma:	“I’m sorry” won’t cut it!
Takahashi:	Yes, I’m really sorry.
Fujimoto:	(lol) “I had enough” (lol)
Tamai:	That was “YanDo boke returns”!
Takahashi:	Yes, thank you~
Sanma:	Don’t let a corner like this return!!!
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Tamai:	(lol) I’m sorry…
Takahashi:	Ai!
Tamai:	The song please.
Sanma:	What song is this?
Takahashi:	Umm… It’s from Tsunku-san’s album “TAKE 1″ which was released in February 2004.
Sho-ji:	Oh.
Takahashi:	“LOVE~since”… Huh?
Fujimoto:	1999.
Takahashi:	(lol) “LOVE~since 1999~”

Song: Tsunku with Takahashi Ai 「LOVE~since 1999~」 (60′39”)

“Listener wo iyashitai!” corner (63′01”)

• The bg music of the title call is Natsumi Abe’s “Datte Ikitekanakucha”

Tamai:	The “Listener wo iyashitai!” corner!!!
Fujimoto:	Yaay!
Sanma:	It’s hopeless today.
Fujimoto:	The title changed to “We want to heal the listeners”, huh?
Tamai:	We’ll heal you like crazy!
Fujimoto:	It was “We want to heal Sanma-san” before, right?
Sanma:	Eh? You haven’t been here since we changed it to “listeners”? You were here, weren’t you?
Fujimoto:	Huh? It was “We want to heal Sanma-san” when I was here.
Sanma:	Yeah, but since you couldn’t heal me, it was changed to “listeners”.
Takahashi:	It was changed.
Fujimoto:	Then I haven’t been here since it was changed.
Sanma:	First time for you?
Takahashi:	It’s your first time?
Sanma:	Were you away for that long?
Fujimoto:	I think so.
Sanma:	You haven’t been here for that long?
Fujimoto:	No.
Sanma:	Ohh, I see… Ehh… It’s been quite a while since we changed it.
Fujimoto:	I used to heal Sanma-san back then.
Sanma:	You couldn’t heal me at all.
Fujimoto:	(lol) I did heal you!
Sanma:	It was only Lum-chan’s and Setsuko-san’s voices that healed me.
Fujimoto:	(lol) “Setsuko-san”
Everyone:	(lol)
Takahashi:	She’s a little girl, you know?
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	Only their voices could heal me.
Fujimoto:	Ahh… yes.
Sanma:	Today it’s the same. You won’t be able to heal me if you don’t use that.
Tamai:	That’s right.
Sanma:	Takahashi is completely useless here, so…
Takahashi:	Why’s that?!
Sanma:	I mean you haven’t even once managed to heal a listener here, have you? Have I ever praised you here?
Takahashi:	Ai.
Sanma:	Not “Ai”!
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Tamai:	“Ai” (lol)
Sanma:	(lol) Are we in Tsukiji or what?!
Fujimoto:	Oh yeah~
Sanma:	This is a corner where Takahashi is holding you back.
Takahashi:	Ara.
Sanma:	You have to do your best here.
Takahashi:	Yes, I’ll do my best.
Sanma:	And you have to gain experience in all kinds of matters.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	It’s no good otherwise. You’re already… 17.
Takahashi:	I’m 18.
Sanma:	18? Big difference.
Takahashi:	Why’s that? I just recently turned 18!
Sanma:	Eh?
Takahashi:	On September 14th.
Sanma:	…..right, right, right.
Fujimoto:	You had forgotten it! You had forgotten it!
Takahashi:	See?
Sanma:	I remembered it! We talked about it here, right?
Takahashi:	That’s right… But you had actually forgotten it, right?
Sanma:	(lol) Yes…
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Well then, we have two phrases today?
Tamai:	Yes, two phrases.
Sanma:	Then decide who’s gonna start off.
Fuji/Taka:	First the stone. Jankenpo. Po. Po. Po.
Fujimoto:	I won.
Takahashi:	I’m weak at janken…
Fujimoto:	I’ll go last.
Sanma:	Ah, I’m thankful for that.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	Takahashi doing it at the end wouldn’t be good.
Takahashi:	Ahh… Yes.
Sanma:	Takahashi, here we go.
Takahashi:	I’ll do my best. This is from Hyougo prefecture, “Takeuchi bikkuri ge ge ge..”
Sanma:	Think about the phrase well. About what kind of situation it is and so on.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	You have to put yourself into the situation.
Takahashi:	Yes. This is from “Takeuchi bikkuri ge ge ge no ge”-san in Hyougo prefecture.
Fujimoto:	(lol)

Takahashi: 「Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”. I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!」 (65′20”~)

(Saying “Mou” all the time would make her turn into a cow. Get it? =D)

Takahashi:	(speaks like a child) Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”. I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop! (02′19”)
Fujimoto:	…..(lol)
Sho-ji:	Cute.
Sanma:	It’s not supposed to be cute! Why do you always turn into an elementary school kid when you say those phrases?!
Takahashi:	Oh… yes.
Sanma:	Get it? I want to hear the adult Takahashi here.
Tamai:	Ohh!
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	So don’t say it like “If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”. I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!!!”.
Fujimoto:	But even if the adult Takahashi said this phrase… (lol) it’d still be about her turning into a cow. Haha(lol)
Sanma:	But there are many different ways to say “I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!” like an adult. Yeah. The way you said it, it sounds like you’re actually transforming into a cow!
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	Yes..
Fujimoto:	(lol) Wait a moment, that’s hilarious!
Sho-ji:	How about you try it with your Mikawa-san voice? The deep one.
Sanma:	That’s right. Try to say it with a deeper voice.
Takahashi:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	(speaking with a very deep voice) Mou!
Sanma:	No. (lol)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Hey, hey… That sounded like a revolting cow!
Takahashi:	Yes… (lol)
Fujimoto:	(rofl) My belly hurts! It hurts!
Sanma:	(imitating Takahashi) Mou!
Takahashi:	Mou.
Sanma:	It always turns out like this because you keep saying unnecessary things.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Mou!”. Get it?
Takahashi:	“Mou!”
Sanma:	“Mou!” Ok, let’s go.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”! I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!
Sanma:	You’ve already turned into one! Your “Mou!” is not good.
Takahashi:	But this phrase has so many “Mou!”s!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	The number of the “Mou”s isn’t the problem! “Mou! If I say ‘Mou!’ it means ‘Mou!’.” But you say it like “Mou! If I say ‘Mou!’ it means ‘Mou!’.” and it sounds weird. You have to raise your voice with each “Mou!”.
Takahashi:	(lol) Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “MOU!”. Hyahyahya(lol)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Takahashi… No one’s told you to try it again and yet you keep wanting to try it again and again.
Takahashi:	Eh?
Sanma:	You say “Yes.” and directly try it again one more time. Be careful of that.
Takahashi:	Ah, you didn’t mean that I should try it again?
Sanma:	No. (lol)
Fujimoto:	(lol) Ahh.. my belly hurts…
Sanma:	“Mou! If I say ‘Mou!’ it means ‘Mou!’.”. It sounds bad because you make the “Mou!” sound like that.
Takahashi:	So it’ll be good if I don’t make it sound like that?
Sanma:	Haahhh?!
Takahashi:	Haha(lol) I’m not supposed to make it sound like that?
Sanma:	“Sound like that” (lol) I got it, it’s because your “Mou!” lacks intonation. Say it like “If I say ‘Mou!’ then it means ‘Mou!’.”.
Takahashi:	You’re good at it!
Sanma:	I’m good, ain’t I? (lol)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	Want me to kill you?
Takahashi:	Ehh?
Fujimoto:	(rofl)
Sanma:	Say it like that.
Takahashi:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	Ahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	(lol) Mou! If I say “Mou!” it means “Mou!”. I’ll turn into a cow if you don’t stop!
Sanma:	Wrong. (lol)
Takahashi:	Eh, I don’t get it anymore…
Fujimoto:	Ahh.. she sounded like Satou Tamao-san…
Sanma:	(lol) You’re right…. Eh, why?
Fujimoto:	Well, her “I’ll turn into a cow!” sounded like her.
Takahashi:	Ara!
Fujimoto:	That was cute.
Sanma:	Well… Mikitty, you gotta save this round now.
Fujimoto:	Yes! This is from “Yuusuke Kagekidan”-san in Toyama prefecture.

Fujimoto: 「Hey… Why don’t you tell me?」 (68′24”~)

Fujimoto:	Hey… Why don’t you tell me? (05′23”)
Sanma:	Ahh…
Takahashi:	She’s good!
Sanma:	Good. Well, Miki-chan’s…
Sho-ji:	“She’s good!” (lol)
Sanma:	What’s with that “She’s good!”? It’s because she’s got a nice voice. It’s a voice that makes men happy.
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Ahh, but it’s something she was born with.
Sanma:	Yes, it’s something you have to be born with.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	Yeah… I’m sorry, but you weren’t born with such a voice, poor kid.
Fujimoto:	“Poor kid” (lol)
Takahashi:	“Poor kid”, huh? Please tell that to my mother instead.
Sanma:	My mother didn’t bear me with such a voice either. You have to change and form your body with your own power.
Takahashi:	I’ll do my best.
Sanma:	Yeah, you better do your best.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	The next phrase.
Takahashi:	This is from “Fafu ni-ru”-san in Yamaguchi prefecture.
Sanma:	The way you said “Yamaguchi prefecture” is already weird!
Takahashi:	(sexy voice: ON) From “Fafu ni-ru”-san in Yamaguchi prefecture~
Fujimoto:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	“Thank you very much.”. Ochiai Keiko-san became famous through small things like that.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sho-ji:	That’s ancient!
Sanma:	Eh?
Sho-ji:	Comparing her with Ochiai-san is a bit… (lol)
Fujimoto:	I don’t know who that is.
Tamai:	Even I don’t know her. (lol)
Takahashi:	I don’t know either.
Sanma:	Well, she used to say something like “We received this from XXX-kun in Yamaguchi prefecture. Thank you.”. And with that little “Thank you” she won the hearts of the listeners. You girls don’t even put that kind of effort into it. It’s wrong to think that it’s enough if you just read it out like that.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Tamai:	Let’s try it out.
Takahashi:	We received this from “Fafu-ni-ru”-san in Yamaguchi prefecture. Thank you~
Sanma:	No, not like that! (lol)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	That sounded like Misora Hibari-san saying “Thank you”! It’s different!
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Takahashi:	Thank you~!
Sanma:	You know, you have to sound sexy. Your voice doesn’t have enough sex appeal.
Takahashi:	Tenkyuu~
Sanma:	What… what’s that?
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	What’s “tenkyuu”?
Takahashi:	I thought it might sound sexy.
Sanma:	It didn’t!
Tamai:	Where did that come from… (lol)
Sho-ji:	She turned “Thank you” into “Tenkyuu”.
Takahashi:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	How about saying “Tenkyuu” from now on?
Sanma:	Are you Spanish or what?!
Takahashi:	(lol) I’m Japanese.
Sanma:	I know that!!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Now hurry up. Say the phrase in a sexy way from the beginning. Otherwise it won’t work out.
Takahashi:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	From Yamaguchi prefectur… Huh?
Sanma:	Come on, hurry up.
Takahashi:	This is from “Fafu-ni-ru”-san in Yamaguchi prefecture.
Sanma:	Yeah.
Takahashi:	Thank you~
Everyone:	(lol)

Takahashi: 「Don’t look!」 (70′40”~)

Takahashi:	(back to elementary school Takahashi) Don’t look!! (07′39”)
Everyone:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	That was good!
Sanma:	I’ll kill you, idiot!
Takahashi:	How am I supposed to say this…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	You should be able to imagine how to say “Don’t look!”!! It’s “Don’t look~!” and not “DON’T LOOK!!”. You sounded like some evil spirit screaming!
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	“DON’T LOOK!!”
Fujimoto:	“Evil spirit” (rofl)
Takahashi:	(lol) Why…?
Sanma:	Look, you should be able to imagine the situation! Right?
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	How should I tell you to make you understand…
Takahashi:	It means “Don’t look at me!”, right?
Sanma:	I know! That’s not the problem here!
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	You… acorn woman, you…!
Takahashi:	(lol) “Acorn”?
Fujimoto:	(rofl) My belly… it hurts so much…
Sanma:	Playing me for a fool, you…
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	“Don’t look…”. It should be more like “Don’t look…”.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Sanma:	Now, go, go.
Takahashi:	Yes…
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	Don’t you… (lol)
Fujimoto:	(lol) She’s scared, she’s scared…
Sanma:	No, more like… well, who cares. Try it more like this. “Don’t look.”. Try to express that you don’t want him to look at you, that it’s embarrassing for you.
Takahashi:	Yes!
Sanma:	Ok.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	(with a tiny voice) Don’t look.
Sanma:	No(lol)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	Who told you to talk like Kitty-chan?!
Sho-ji:	Try to imagine that your bath towel just fell down. Suddenly.
Sanma:	Yeah. Your bath towel just fell down and you say that line.
Takahashi:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	LOOK AWAY!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	That sounded like “Look at me.”.
Sanma:	“Look at me” (lol) “Look at me” makes you sound like a perv….
Takahashi:	I thought I would say “Look away” in a situation like that.
Sanma:	You’d say “LOOK AT ME!”?!
Takahashi:	No, like “Look away!”, “Look over there!”.
Sanma:	I don’t know what to do to make you understand…
Takahashi:	How should I say it?
Sanma:	Imagine you’re staying over at his place for the first time.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	I think this is the only way to make you understand. It’s the first time for you to stay over at the place of the person you like.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	And it’s embarrassing for you to show him your chest.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Sanma:	But the guy tries to have a look at your chest.
Takahashi:	Yeah.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	You have to express the way you’d feel in such a moment.
	(the music box plays)
Takahashi:	(speaks quickly) Don’t look!
Everyone:	(lol)
Sanma:	You wouldn’t say it like that. Not like that.
Tamai:	What was that…
Sanma:	There’s no way you’d say it like that. You should take a break too!
Takahashi:	I had enough. It’s enough.
Sanma:	What?! Then go home!
Sho-ji:	I think you shouldn’t stay over at a guy’s place.
Sanma:	Don’t stay over at a guy’s place!
Takahashi:	Ahh… Then I’ll pay a penalty.
Sanma:	Don’t ever do it.
Takahashi:	That’d be a relief for me too.
Sanma:	Don’t you break that promise! If you do, you gotta pay me 10.000 yen as a penalty.
Takahashi:	Yes.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	Ok, next one.
Fujimoto:	Ok. This is from “Warai ga tomaranai TsujiKago”-san in Kyouto.

Fujimoto: 「Darling, you really are an idiot~!」 (73′18”~)

Fujimoto:	Darling, you really are an idiot~! (10′17”)
Sanma:	Say it more properly! It’s the kind of sentence you’re best at.
Fujimoto:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	Put more energy into it. Like Lum-chan.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	Ok.
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	Darling… You really are an idiot~!
Sanma:	Ahh, this is nice..
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Takahashi:	This is unfair!
Sanma:	This is really good. “That’s no good~!”.
Takahashi:	She’s so good at it!
Sanma:	Say “Don’t look” like Lum-chan. “Don’t you look~!”
Fujimoto:	(lol)
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	Darling. Don’t you look~!
Sanma:	Nah, it should be “You can’t look~!”.
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sanma:	“You’re not allowed to look~!”.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	Darling. You’re not allowed to look~!
Sanma:	Ahh, good! Now “Darling, don’t take it out~!”
Fujimoto:	Take what out? (lol)
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	Hey.
Sanma:	Eh?
Sho-ji:	Isn’t it enough already?
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sho-ji:	How much further do you wanna push it?
Tamai:	Haha(lol)
Fujimoto:	What did he take out?
Sho-ji:	No, no, nothing…
Fujimoto:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	He just took something weird out of his pocket…
Fujimoto:	(lol) What did he take out?
Sanma:	I took it out.
Fujimoto:	What? (lol)
Sanma:	It doesn’t matter what. It doesn’t matter what I took out. Just say it.
Tamai:	“Don’t take it out~!”
Sanma:	(lol) Yes.
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	(lol) My belly hurts… (lol)
Sanma:	Hey, do it properly!
Fujimoto:	Please wait a second here! Ok.
	(the music box plays)
Fujimoto:	Darling. Don’t take… (rofl)
Sanma:	Enough already. I won’t talk with you anymore.
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Fujimoto:	(lol) Why not?!
Sanma:	The end, the end. Let’s end it. I don’t have time to waste on something stupid like this.
Fujimoto:	(lol) It’s Sanma-san who started it!!
Sho-ji:	You started it. Hahaha(lol)
Tamai:	Now, which one of the two could heal you more?
Sanma:	It’s clearly Mikitty.
Takahashi:	Ehhhh~
Fujimoto:	Yaaay!
Tamai:	Yaaay. (applause)
Sanma:	An overwhelming victory. Overwhelming.
Fujimoto:	I’m glad.
Sanma:	You have to study more, Takahashi!
Takahashi:	This is unfair!
Sanma:	Ehh?!
Takahashi:	Unfair!
Sanma:	“Unfair” (lol) Are you a kid or what? Idiot.
Takahashi:	(lol)
Tamai:	(reads out the contact details of this corner)

Karaoke Box 「Sanchama」 (75′34”)

Sanma:	Karaoke Box Sanchama~!
Everyone:	Yaaay!
Sanma:	Today Tamai will sing one of Mr. Children’s songs.
Tamai:	Yes.
Sanma:	“Tomorrow never….”
Fujimoto:	“…knows.”
Sanma:	“…knows.”. He’ll sing “Sanma Tomorrow never knows” for us.
Tamai:	Yes. We received the lyrics from “Inamura Duuun”-san.
Sanma:	Inamura Duuun.
Fujimoto:	Duuun.

• 「Sanma Tomorrow never knows」 (parody of Mr.Children 「Tomorrow never knows」) Tamai sings it

Translation: (00′24”) During his talk which knows no end He’s had many different YanMusume in front of his eyes They’re too young to respond to his perverted dirty jokes And he gets stopped by Sho-ji sitting next to him While simple-mindedly betraying others He always wants to give something to others Even the belt and shoes he came wearing But one year has already passed and he still couldn’t hand over the presents Sometimes his promised items change midway, but we still don’t get to see them Unclear when he’ll hand them over, he continues his talk every year Sanma-san is someone who’s so forgetful it’s almost sad He forgets birthday presents and the person the present was for While moving forward as a comedian He doesn’t even go easy on idols Just like that our leading figure is trying too hard today again He can’t remember the birthdays of the ever-changing YanMusume regulars Even if he buys something for someone He can’t hand it over to that someone He just gives it to whoever is around And later can’t remember who he gave it to Roma-ji: Todomaru koto wo shiranai TOOKU no naka de Nannin mo kawariyuku YanMusu wo nagameteita Osonasugite furenai sukoshi kitsui shimoneta wo Tonari ni iru Sho-ji ni tomeraretari shite Mujaki ni hito wo uragiri nagara Itsumo nanika agetagatteru Jibun ga kitekiteru BERUTO ya kutsu de sae mo Tewatasu koto sae dekizu ni sugu ichinen ga tachi Tochuu de mono kawaru keredo mo mada genbutsu wa miezu Itsu watasu ka wakaranai mama maitoshi TOOKU wa tsudzuiteru Sanma-san wa kanashii kurai wasureteyuku ikimono Tanjoubi no PUREZENTO mo watasu hito mo Warai de mae ni susumu koto de wa AIDORU ni mo yousha shinai Sonna fuu ni shite oogosho ga kyou mo harikiri sugiteiru Kotei shinai YanMusume REGYURA- no tanjoubi oboenai Dareka no tame ni kattekite mo Honnin ni wa watarazu ni Sono ba no kuuki de kubaru no sa Dare ni ageta ka mo oboezu ni (from “Inamura Duuun”)

 

Sanma:	I don’t know this song, so it doesn’t ring any bells. (03′31”)
Everyone:	(lol)
Sho-ji:	But I totally agree with the lyrics.
Everyone:	Haha(lol)
Sanma:	The end.

Ending (79′13”)

Sanma:	Now… Since Mikitty has completely recovered…
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	…I’m sure your fans are very happy about it.
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	The fans sent you a lot of encouraging letters, didn’t they?
Fujimoto:	Yes, they did. And also when I returned to the concert tour, they wrote messages to me on large sketchbooks.
Sanma:	Yeah.
Fujimoto:	They wrote things like “I’m glad that I could see you today.”.
Sanma:	Ah, like “Mikitty, thank you!” and “Thank you for coming back!”?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	So you see that kind of messages everyday and get full of yourself, huh?
Fujimoto:	(lol) I don’t get full of myself! But you know, I’m the type who no one ever worries about. Even if I tell my manager that I easily get dizzy because I’m somewhat anemic, they’d only tell me “Well, tell me when you feel unwell.”. (lol)
Sanma:	Yeah, yeah.
Fujimoto:	But this was the first time they were worried about me!
Sanma:	Ah, your manager? Because you got sick?
Fujimoto:	Yes. All the people around me.
Sanma:	Ahh… That’s nice.
Fujimoto:	Normally they say “If it’s Fujimoto, she’ll be alright.”. (lol)
Sanma:	So it was the first time for you to take a break?
Fujimoto:	Yes.
Sanma:	The first time in your career?
Fujimoto:	That’s right.
Sanma:	Takahashi doesn’t look like she’d get sick easily either.
Takahashi:	(with a voice like she was sick) Well, I…
Tamai:	Hahaha(lol)
Sanma:	(lol) You just did that on purpose, didn’t you?
Sho-ji:	You sounded like a mid-aged man.
Sanma:	What did you want to say?
Takahashi:	I don’t remember it well. Even if I had caught a cold, I wouldn’t remember it afterwards. Have I ever had a cold?
Fujimoto:	It probably means that you haven’t had one.
Takahashi:	Have I had a cold? I think I have!
Sanma:	…….that was Akashiya Sanma.
Takahashi:	(lol)
Tamai:	Tamai Kenji.
Sho-ji:	Murakami Sho-ji.
Fujimoto:	From Morning Musume, Fujimoto Miki and..
Takahashi:	..Takahashi Ai.
Sanma:	Let’s meet next week again. Goodbye~!
Everyone:	Goodbye~!
Takahashi:	Bye bye~!

• Ending song is The Eagles’ “Take it Easy”